A road, a butterfly, and two hearts
by brokenvoice
Summary: No, i don't give you my heart. I rip out the beating organ, that gives me life, from my chest and place it on a platter. To which you pick up a knife and make it bleed or cradle it gently and replace it with your own.
1. God

AN: Hey folks I've finally got a laptop! Yep I'm very excited about it. Well I've decided to write this story after reading so many twilight fanfics. Hope I do a good job. This is my first Alice/Bella so please tell me how I do.

Disclaimer: I do not in any way own twilight. I do however own the new pokemon game on the ds

Enjoy

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Prologue

**God**

The almighty creator of our world.  
The man people worship as ** If**

There's nothing better to do.  
He's a tyrant. A ruler of many minds. **God**

A savior of man, woman, and child.  
Yet we can't see him or feel him. He ** Is**

A king of nations. A legend.  
Yet this god, this legend, is as ** Real**

As a ghost. Invisible to sinners and?  
in the hearts of believers. so **Why **

Does he not come when we cry help?  
When our families are dying. When man **Did**

The unspeakable. When murder became  
honor. Honor became murder .When ** My**

Country perished in the eternal flames  
of lies, death, and ** Love**

Seized to exists. There is no God. No hope.  
No faith. There's just loss and pain in this  
world were sooner or later we all **Die.**

Darkness. Pure darkness. That's what I see, every second. Every time I blink, darkness. No light what so ever. Did I suddenly go blind? No, no that can't be it. You can feel it if your blind…right?

Maybe I'm dead. No, no I don't remember dying. I believe I would remember dying. Am I buried? Have I been buried alive? So many questions filled my head. Questions I don't have answers too. Where can I find these answers? Are they in my head? I wouldn't know, I can't see anything, let alone know what's in my head. Maybe (hopefully) I'm just dreaming. Yes this all a nightmare and if I pitch myself I'll wake up.

What? I cant' move my arms. I can't move anything. Okay okay breath girl, breath. Well at least I can hear myself breathing. That means I'm alive. Okay one question down, millions to go. Like where am I? How did I get here? I don't remember. I don't remember anything. Who am I? What's my name? How old am I? For Gods sakes I need to think. But it hurts. It all hurts.

I'm numb all over. Why am I numb? Who took me? And more importantly why? Why me? Did I piss someone off so bad they decided to take me? No, no I'm a good kid….right? I must be. Bad things always happen to good people..OW! Fuck what was that? That hurt my head. Was it a memory? Maybe. Let's think. I saw a girl. Or was it a woman? I don't know. I don't know! I feel so empty.

Maybe I am dead.

No I have to stop thinking negative. I'll get out of here. Someone who knows me will help me. Someone has to know me right? Maybe I've never really existed. I'm just a figment of my imagination. But then I wouldn't be anything cause if I'm not real then my imagination doesn't exists.

By God I'm going crazy

I'm a psycho girl who's tied up in the dark and has no idea who she is. Priceless. Do I have a family? Yes I must have a family. Maybe a little brother. Or a sister. Maybe I have a dog. I like cats better. I'm a cat person. I think. Something's dripping down my arm. What is that? Water? No, no.

It's blood.

My blood. Maybe that's why everything hurts. Okay so I'm not dead and I'm bleeding. That's some improvement. My ears are ringing. You know they say when your ears ring someone's talking about you. Which means at least someone knows me. That's a good thing. Unless they hate my guts and want to kill me…. Man maybe I did piss someone off enough to take me.

You know what would be cool? If my dad was a cop or my mom. Either or. Then they'd have a whole swat team looking for me. Breaking down doors just to save my sorry ass. I mean I am the one who got taken.

I wish I could remember. Remember something. Like a birthday. Or a face. Have you ever forgotten your own face? It's like looking in a mirror and not seeing anything. Or not recognizing who your looking at. Imagine how that must feel and you'll get my drift.

Time seems frozen now. I can count seconds in my head.. 1...2...3...4.….but I never know when it's been a minute or an hour. I don't have anywhere to start. I don't want to be here anymore. The darkness, the blood, the silence it's messing with my head. I want to go home! Why can't I go home?

step step

What's that! Footsteps? That means someone's here. Is that good or bad?

step step step

I can't tell. You know when you look at someone and you can read them? Well let me tell you footsteps aren't like that. You can't tell if the person is going to kill you or save you. Please God be the second one.

step step step step

There getting closer now. I can feel it. It's like an earthquake is shaking the ground and I'm right on top of it. I can feel myself trembling beneath the ropes. The ropes cut my skin with every shake. Don't panic. Breath. Breath.

step step step step step

Oh god, I'm going to die aren't I? I'm going to die not knowing who I am. Why can't I remember her beautiful face? Or his handsome features? Playing in the backyard under the tree or swimming in the ocean.

Walking along the sand or singing a song till my throat was raw.

step step step step step step

Have I ever been in love? As I sit here, listening to the footsteps of a person I don't know come closer I wonder about these things. Do I know what it's like to be in love? To have a storybook romance.

Do I know what I love you means? Or are they just a bunch of words to me? I wish I could remember. Remember if I've given my whole being to be with someone. To live for them and only them. Maybe that's why I'm here. In this darkness. Feeling numb with pain. And blood dripping down my arms. Maybe I did it for love.

But that's just wishful thinking. I'm no knight in shining armor. No, I've been burned by the dragon.

step step step step step step step

The footsteps are almost here now. I know I must fight. Fight to remember. So let's start with the facts. Facts I know.

Number 1: I'm surrounded by darkness

step

Number 2: Whoever is coming decides my fate. Whether that's good or bad, I don't know…yet.

Step step

Number 3: The pain is my friend. I need to embrace the pain. Love the pain. Pain means I'm alive. And being alive is the most important fact of all.

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Please review


	2. Rain rain go away

AN: I was so excited to see people add this story to their story alerts :] I don't know how quickly I'll be updating, so if I take a while I'm sorry. School is ending fast so big testing coming up. Well anyways here is chapter one.

Disclaimer: I do not own any part of twilight, I do however own an xbox 360

Enjoy

Rain rain go away

Forks High School. The name of hell. Well at least my hell. You know after so many years of repeating high school you'd think we'd at least go to college. Or try it. But no we have to go through those four (very short years for a vampire mind you) again and again and again and again and….well you get the idea. Every time it's the same damn thing. You've got the jocks, nerds, geeks (yes there's a difference. Weird) Cheerleaders, Goths, the nobodies, and the outcast.

That's me and my family. The outcast. We're the one who sit together, only together, and whisper amongst ourselves. Well I don't believe it's really whispering cause only we can hear ourselves. It's not that I'm whispering loudly so people across the room can hear me. Stupid.

Anyways back to my family. Yes there's five of us, not counting our parents. First is Edward, the moody man. He's what humans consider 'emo'. Second there's Jasper, he's like Edward, just instead of no emotion he has one. Pain. His face is always in a grimace. I like to believe he was born like that. Third, Emmet. My giant teddy bear, in every sense of the word. He's massive. But I believe all that muscle damaged his brain. He's so blonde sometimes. Just don't tell Rose I said that. Ah Rosalie, number four, my 'big' sister. She's a b-I-t-c-h. But I believe that's only cause she's had a rough time. All of us have.

Then there's me. I'm Alice. People see me as spunky and hyped up on sugar (as if vampires can do that) all the time. I smile when it rains and I'm rarely sad. I love to shop. I could live at a mall if only Carlisle will let me…..

We're a family of vampires. Yes I said vampires. You know the whole 'I'm going to suck your blood" (insert creepy accent here) and all that. The only difference is we, meaning my family, don't feed off humans. No we're _vegetarians _deciding to drain animals to control our thirst.

A thirst that burns our throats like a fire raging consuming a building to ash. A thirst that could make us lose control and bring us out of the shadows. Bring the truth to the light. A thirst I've never lost control of.

You see I have excellent control, for a vampire, and it's very hard for me to snap. I've been around humans for tens of years and haven't given into that urge to bite. To suck the blood of my victim and feel them die within my grasp.

Until now.

Before I tell you anymore, there's something you should know. Edward, Jasper, and I all have gifts. Why we have them, I can't say. Edward can read peoples minds. It's really annoying mind you. Jasper can feel peoples emotions and alternate them. If someone's pissed he can make them happy. Mad to sad. Yea you get the point. Me, I can see the future. The only problem is that's it's not set in stone. These visions I get are based off choices. And choices can change constantly.

Except instinct.

Instinct is a reaction in your body you can't control. Like, for example, the instinct to jump out of the way of a speeding car. Or to let a monster lose. A monster so powerful, it can't even stop itself. I've never had to tangle with my monster. I know it's inside me, waiting to be let free every time I come close to a human. Every time I smell one. It's hard, to control my monster, but I've always done it.

Until I met her.

In my 108 years of living (if that's what you want to call it) I've never _felt _so close to my monster. To feel it pulse beneath my skin. To feel the raging fire in my throat to turn into an endless inferno. The gates I've placed around my monster to crumble like bread in the water. The chains to snap like a rubber band. With it's shackles released it cannot be stopped.

I could not be stopped.

I've never been in love before. As a vampire at least. It's hard finding someone to spend your life with when you've already spent yours. So the logical thing to do would be to mate with a vampire.

I've always been different. Different isn't always good.

I wish I would have saw myself, falling for a mortal. Then I would have flown across the world, away from home and my family, for the next 50 or so years. At least until that certain human died. But like I said my visions are by choice. And instinct. Maybe throw a little bit of fate in there too.

My instant instinct when I first laid eyes on her was to protect. Protect and love. She was mine and no one else's. I guess you could say I was possessive of her. Another trait of my monster.

The very same monster that almost destroyed my love. My new life was born that day. A flower sprouting for the first time. A tree getting it's first branch.

But then the rain came. And washed it all away. Down to the sea, where everything's lost. Buried beneath countless waves. The rain washed away all the evidence of my love. It washed away my gates. It washed away my chains. It washed away my control. My love come back to me when the sun shines. Come back to me.

Rain rain, go away.

* * *

" Alice! Hurry up we've got to go!" Emmett yelled from down the stairs. Like he really needed to do that. I mean we're vampires with super hearing and all that.

"I'm coming! Just hold on a second!" I shouted back, while running around my room looking for that perfect outfit. Hey just cause I'm 108 years old doesn't mean I can't look good. I decided to go with a regular simple outfit. You know jeans, a cute shirt, and some nice shoes. I grabbed my bag and ran downstairs to meet my 'siblings' in the living room.

" Really Alice can't you just grab and go?" my other brother Edward asked with a shake of his head.

" No, unlike you I like to look nice." stupid prick

A scowl formed on his face. " I heard that short stuff"

"Well then stay out of my head!"

Rosalie huffed," seriously let's go!" and marched out into the garage with Emmett in march behind her. Man he's one sick love puppy. A snicker from Edward. I just roll my eyes and follow my crazy family.

We live in Forks, Washington. Not the biggest place in the world but it works for us. Apparently we follow the vampire stereotype, liking dark places instead of light. Except we don't sleep during the day and we don't sleep in coffins. Hell we don't sleep at all. No we spend our nights reading or feeding. Feeding on animals mind you. See we aren't like other-

'Snap snap snap'

" Seriously Ali, you're like the one vampire with ADD." Jasper says with a chuckle

I look around and notice we've arrived school. "Hey where did everyone go?"

"To class. The bell rang like 3 minutes ago. Come on lets go. We have art first period remember?"

"Yea yea I know. Sorry I was…daydreaming."

We got out of the car and instantly I was hit with the aroma of blood. It wasn't so great once you've been around it for so long. Well at least it doesn't bother me. I look over at jasper and see him pull back in pain.

"It's okay Jazz, come on let's go to class." See Jasper is new to our lifestyle. He's not used to the blood like we are. So he has to try harder to control his thirst.

To control his monster. But he does it well and that's what makes me proud of him. First period is my favorite class. Besides shopping I love to draw. It makes me feel creative and free. More _human _I could say. The bell rang right when we got in the door, so in truth we're pretty slow for vampires.

The teacher turned to the class and clapped her hands together, "okay okay calm down class. I know you all must have had great weekends, but now it's time to work." She turned back to the board and begin to write things I couldn't care less about. I mean I probably know more than she does. It comes with being 108 years old I believe.

There are times, even as a vampire, that _time _itself stands still. This was that time.

She walked into the classroom with haste. You could tell she was flustered beyond belief. Long brown flowing hair shaped her heart shape face perfectly. Simple brown eyes, but they held so much mystery. So much secret. She was beautiful beyond belief. To beautiful.

I could _feel _her blood pulsing from where I sat. This was a bad sign. A very bad sign.

As a vampire there are three things I'm certain of.

One: I've never been in love. Even as a human (of whatever I can remember). Never had my heart beat for someone else. Never felt the need to protect someone to the ends of the earth. And back. Never dreamed of dying for one person. Giving up myself to save them.

Two: My visions are my life. I can tell you if it rains, to who's winning the football game. Even when they change. My visions have never failed me and they've always been there for me. To save me from surprises.

Three: Blood, human blood, has never _called_ to me. Never pleated for me to drink it. To feel it run down my throat filling me in the beset possible way. I've never needed human blood to survive. Animal blood satisfied me enough.

Those three things I just mentioned flew out the window.

_My love I feel I've met you in a dream. A dream that shakes the boundaries of my reality. Do I take your hand and feel at ease? Or will my monster need be pleased?_

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AN: Ta da! The first chapter is finished. I hope everyone likes. :] Please please review. I'm not going to not write another chapter unless you guys review (I will whether people do or not) but I want to know what you guys think. Anyways until next time.

-broken


	3. A Scream of Reality

AN: I'm so happy I've gotten some reviews! I was going to update sooner, but I was actually busy during Spring Break. (Surprisingly) Anyways schools back and I will be updating more and more hopefully.

Disclaimer: I do not in anyway, shape, or form own twilight or it's characters. Or the lovely song Wasted by L.P. I do however own a wii

I'd like to dedicate this chapter to Roselie's Muse, NandihaMa, and A Little Bit Clumsy Bella. Thank you three for reviewing. It make me smile and dance around like an idiot.

Enjoy

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A Scream of reality

_Is a dream still a dream when it's happening in reality? Is it still out of reach? A reach so far no matter how hard you stretch your arm you can't touch it. Is reality no longer real when a dream comes true? Does everything you know burn in an impressive blaze you can't help but stare at? Do you feel the burn on your skin? Can you feel your body break out in a sweat? Where has my reality gone? Where along this long road did I lose it? Will I ever get it back? Or is it lost in an endless vortex of nothing with no hopes of every coming back._

I couldn't tell you why I was the only teenager in the world who thought of others. It's a curse I've come to live with. I can tell you other simpler things. Like my favorite color is blue. I hate rainy places. The sun is my friend. I'm the most clumsy person you'll ever meet.

I'm not joking. I trip on _air. _You know how impossible that is? It's as possible as a transforming car or a young wizard named Harry Potter destined to destroy evil and save the world. Or a talking sponge who lives in a pineapple under the sea and has adventures with his pink starfish best friend. Yea it's that impossible.

Anyways before I go on and on into some boring talk, lets get back to reality. My names Bella Swan and I'm in hell.

Okay ok I'm not really in hell, but it's as close as you can get. I'm in Forks, Washington. One of the wettest places on earth. Where the rain rules and the suns is just a myth. I moved here about a month ago to live with my dad Charlie Swan. He's the local sheriff in this small town. (And I do mean small. I could shout hey at the top of my lungs and everyone and their grandma would here it.) I used to live in Phoenix Arizona with my mom, until she met this baseball stud and suddenly I felt like I was the one budding in.

So, unfortunate, I decided to be a big girl and give my mom an another chance at happiness. Now she can be with Phil and I can finish my high school career here.

Oh Mr. devil just burn me now.

You may think I'm being a bit overdramatic, but I'm not. Have you ever been the new kid in a town so small you could take 20 steps and reach the next town over? I didn't think so.

So like I said I'm in hell and I'm not coming out anytime soon.

* * *

"Bella!" Charlie's voice rang out throughout the house "Get up it's time for school!"

"Alright! Thanks Cha- dad!" I heard a gruff and footsteps descending down the stairs. Oh great first day of school. Yay me. Getting out of bed I shiver as my feet hit the cold hardwood floor. Would it kill a man to buy some carpet I mean seriously.

"Good morning bells. I didn't know if you had anything for school so I bought you some stuff. It's on the desk by the couch."

"Thanks C-dad. I appreciate it." I really got to get used to calling him dad, instead of Charlie.

"Alright we'll I'm off to work. Be careful on the way to school and remember to warm the truck up before you go."

Ah yes, the truck. Or should I say my truck. It was a gift from Charlie, he gave it to me yesterday. It's actually quiet a beauty. I mean I'm no car(truck?) person, but as long as it runs and doesn't look like crap I'm good to go.

So I finish my breakfast and set off for school. What fun this is going to be. At least this trucks got a good stereo system. It's about a 15 minute drive, considering we live at the edge of town. Why this is I don't know. Ah! Here we go, a station that works.

"Good morning everyone, looks like another cloudy day here in Seattle. We're going to go back a bit and give you all sometime to remise. Hit it Jay…"

_**Don't waste it, It's only here for today, You don't own it, So you can't just give it away, Forever, Forever is half a moment away, So don't waste it, It's only here for today, Everything is waiting here, Don't mess with my heart, don't mess with my mind, Won't let you get us down this time. You'll like what you see, and take it from me, You'll learn to see it over time. Get wasted on love, get wasted on life, Get wasted on anything that's right. Get wasted, get wasted, get wasted, Get wasted with me. It seems empty, I don't know what you expect, If you don't give, You're never going to get, Forever is half a moment away, You don't get, back what you thew away. Everything is waiting here. Don't mess with my heart, don't mess with my mind, Won't let you get us down this time. You'll like what you see, and take it from me, You'll learn to see it over time. Get wasted on love, get wasted on life, Get wasted on anything that's right. Get wasted, get wasted, get wasted, Get wasted with me. Everything is waiting here Don't mess with my heart, don't mess with my mind, Won't let you get us down this time. You'll like what you see, and take it from me, You'll learn to see it over time. Get wasted on love, get wasted on life, Get wasted on anything that's right. Get wasted, get wasted, get wasted, Get wasted with me……….**_

That song does bring back memories. Time really does sneak up on you. Whoa speaking of time I'm going to be late if I don't hurry. I still have to find the office. Great. As I pull into the parking lot I realize a couple things, One: My car looks like everyone else's, (except for those shiny cars over there in the corner…) Two: Forks High isn't as small as I thought I would be. Third: Everyone and their mother is staring at me.

_This is your captain speaking. We have reached our destination and should be landing shortly. Welcome to hell ladies and gentlemen._

Maybe I could flee the country. Yea I could move to Japan, learn to speak Japanese, eat ramen for the rest of my life, and make a career on producing anime shows for the world. Anything is better than this.

So I've decided to play splinter cell and pretend I'm invisible. I'll just blend in with the shadows and no one will notice-

"Hello there! You must be Isabella, the chiefs daughter. Pleasure to met you, the names Eric." Well so much for the splinter cell idea. Damn you Sam Fisher. Damn you and your awesome skills of hiding.

"Uh hi, um yea, and it's Bella." This boy, um Eric, grins and loops his arm around my shoulder. He's okay looking, I could say. He's got black shaggy hair, a nice polo shirt, some jeans, and his school bag. Like I said okay looking, but so not my type. Or my preference if you prefer.

" Well okay then, Bella.." Another grin. Geez I think I'm going to call him Smiley or something. " If you need anything, please don't hesitate to ask. I'm your man."

"Um, thanks. (I think) Actually I'm just going to the office, so could you point me in the right direction?"

" How about I just take you there? It's no problem I'll be glad to help."

I bet you would. " No no thanks, I want to find my own way. So direction please?"

He resembles something of a pout, but complies anyways. I thank him with a wave and go in the direction his finger points. Okay now maybe I could try the whole splinter cell idea agai-

Oof! "Whoa hey there I'm sorry. Are you okay…, hey your Isabe-"

"It's just Bella"

Shrug. " Right Bella, the chiefs daughter right?"

I get up off my ass and nod " Yea that's me. Anyways I got to go . Sorry for bumping into you……"

"Mike. The names Mike. I could take you to wherever your going. I know this school like the back of my hand."

Yea buddy I bet you know where all the supply closets are too. NO thanks Mr. slick. Man I really need to work on my splinter cell skills. It's so easy in the game….

" um , no, but thanks anyways Mike."

I go to walk past him, but he easily blocks my path. Great this is so not my day.

"Come on bells-"

"It's Bella."

"Right right, anyways it's no big. I'd love to help a lady out." He smiles and I'm guessing it's suppose to be charming. You know that kind of smile that's makes girls fall to their knees and blah blah blah. Yea I'm so not falling for it. I'd say though if I was any other girl I'd probably for Mr. Prince Charming. He's well built (for a short kid anyway) short blond hair and blue eyes that people die for. Well people who's not me anyways.

" Look Mike, I appreciate the help, but im fine by myself." I don't give him a chance to reply and just hastily make my way past him. From the corner of my eye I can see him and it looks like someone just killed his puppy. Well truth be told I'm more of a cat person.

I finally make it to the office without running into anymore persistent men. Sometimes I'd rather be a guy. The office lady waves me to a chair cause apparently the phone call she's having is more important than the new student.

Old hag.

The room smells like wild flowers and it reminds me of home. I mean my old home. With the sun, the fresh air, the familiar faces, and my mother. Even though I didn't have many friends back in Phoenix I never minded. I'm more of a caterpillar than a butterfly. I'd rather be the spectator than the main performance.

The old hag, *cough*, I mean nice office lady is finally done with her phone call and waves me over to her.

"Ah yes Isabella Swan. Glad to see the chiefs daughter back home. Here are your papers and your schedule. Your locker combination and your gym clothes. If you have any questions go ahead and ask." She smiles and I could tell she doesn't want me to ask anything. It's that kind of smile that's forced and way to sweet it's almost sick. I can imagine her screaming in her mind " I hate this job and these stupid kids. Who cares if the chiefs daughter is here! I just want to go home and feed my 20 cats." Well f her she smells like a litter box anyways.

I don't even thank her and just walk out of the office just as the bell rings. Well if I'm late at least I have the new student excuse. That's way better than any other one. Hmm lets see my schedule

1st: Art room 210

2nd: English room 15

3rd: French room 352

Lunch

4th: History room 41

5th: Psych room 27

6th: Gym room gym (Of course)

7th: Math room 65

Alright this seemed easy enough. All I have to do was find room 210. I walk along the hallways checking every room number as I go by.

207

208

209

210 ah! Found it. Finally. At least my first period is art, which I happen to like even though I can't draw worth crap. If my life depended on it I would surely die. I opened the door and instantly every ones eyes where on me. Crap. Crap. Crap. Why can't I be like Sam Fisher? And just drop in from the ceiling in cool black gear and just blend in.

"Ah Mrs. Swan. So glad you could finally join us. Yes, please go have a seat by Alice Cullen." The teacher said so quickly then walked away and addressed the class again. I mean hello who the hell is Alice….Cullen….

Holy…Shit…

I'm going to take a guess and say that she's Alice Cullen. Why would I guess this you may ask? Well I'll tell you.

Cause she's looking right at me. No wait scratch that. She's looking right into my soul. It's as if her eyes have reached into my nervous and paralyzed me in an instant. And if her eyes didn't do it, then her whole appearance sure did. She's got spikey hair, that kid that's not drowned in gel, but looks like she woke up with it just like that. Her eyes are a gold kind of color and there so _deep _and _mysterious _I have to swallow the drool that's wanting to run down my chin.

Her body just screams perfect. Curves in the right places. Lets just says she's got a _killer _body. And her lips look so inviting…

Holy. Shit.

Hell, you have never felt so good and I can't wait to get burned.

_Scream for me, my love. Scream until your lungs are raw and your body collapses under me. Scream until the ground shakes and the window panes shatter. Scream until your shivers fade and your world turns black. Scream my love, just scream. _

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A.N.: Ah finally another chapter done. I'm actually quiet proud of this one. I do believe it's longer than my others. I hope everyone likes it. I actually know where I'm going with this story, but if anyone wants to speak an idea or something you can always pm me. I like to make my readers happy. Until next time.

-Broken

P.S. please review. :]


	4. My name is Death

A.N./ Hey all! I got some more reviews so that made me happy. :] I'm updating so fast because we have testing going on in school so teachers are being pretty nice. Which gives me time to write in class and such. So yay!

Disclaimer: If I owned twilight I'd make myself marry Alice and everything would be about us. Haha But has you can see I don't, but I do own a WoW account. For those of you who don't know that means World of Warcraft.

It's true I'm addicted.

I'd like to dedicate this chapter to Luz, blue 1991, and ethans mom. Your guys reviews made me so happy I fell out of my chair. I have hardwood floor.

Enjoy

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My name is Death

_Do you know what it feels like to scream in a room full of people and have no one hear you? Do you know what it's like to feel pain every second, minute, and hour of each day? It's like blood in your veins you cant live without it. Unless, of course, you wish to die. Have you ever wanted to place your hand in fire and watch it burn? Watch your skin melt right off the bone and hear it sizzle. Have you ever wanted to grab a gun, put it to your temple and pull the trigger? Have you ever felt death? Has he breathed in your ear? Touched your skin? Held your hand? Kissed your cheek? When you look in the mirror do you see yourself? Or someone else? You don't see yourself do you? No you see death. Cause in the end that's who you are. That's who I am. I am death._

_Nice to meet you._

Vampires are unbelievably beautiful. We are considered to be flawless. Gods and Goddesses who walk the earth. From the top of our heads to the souls of our feet. Our smile, our smell, our bodies are designed to attract humans.

Attract prey.

We are hunters. The only thing that can stop us is fire. It burns our stone bodies into ash. A pile of nothing. We don't fear people. We don't even believe in death.

Cause we are dead.

We breath without needing to. We move even though our muscles don't need it. We are everything humans are not. But we will never be human again.

The blood in our veins just sits there, wishing to flow and give us warmth. Warmth we never receive.

We are cold hunters. A mortals worst nightmare. We can move on finger and snap their neck. We can play cat and mouse. Letting them escape, running in fear and have them believe they can escape. Then in an instant we're right in front of them sucking the life out of them.

Super strength, incredibly fast, and beauty beyond words. We're so strong we can lift a car with one hand. We're so fast we can run on water. We are so beautiful it can paralyze you with awe. We are designed to kill.

Only to kill.

We live at night and hide in the shadows during the day. We are immortal. Wondering the earth century after century without a care. We live forever. See the world change bit by bit yet we never change with it. We watch people around us die and die and die. We are stuck in a time warp that never ends. And it's always the same.

Humans think they are gods. When they're merry ants, in a giants world. They are deceitful people. Hating what they do not like and supporting what they do. We watch the humans. We know how they all act.

And they're all the same, selfish creatures. I love you cause you're rich. I hate you cause your poor. You're going to heaven cause you follow God. You're going to hell cause you are a sin. Come into my restaurant Mr. White. Get the fuck out Mr. Black. Let's die for our country they cheer! Let's die for our families. Let's create wars after wars just to show who's got the power. Who's on top.

Selfish, hateful creatures.

A vampire doesn't care about this 'God'. We don't give a rats ass about a country. Or being rich. Or poor. Or a sin. Black. White. None of it matters. Just blood and blood.

All except my family. We actually try to blend in with these humans. We try to make ourselves like them. But who are we kidding? We're actors in a play. When the curtain falls we come out and play.

In our play everywhere we go is the same. Same old beginning, middle, and end. The humans stay away from us. From the people that are trying to be like them. They see us as beautiful creatures. Creatures so beautiful they can't speak with us. Cause maybe we won't speak back. The lines never change. The hero always dies. I've always believed this to be true.

Until I saw her smile.

Bella Swan. She was different. A thief hiding in the shadows. She's changed the lines. She's pulling our curtain. Everything will be different. Different beginning, middle, and end.

"Hello." There is a God.

"Hello Isabella." She blushed and I have to fight the monster that breaths within me. Swallowing the venom in my mouth.

"um….Bella."

I laugh. " No, my names Alice."

" No! I mean yes! I mean I prefer Bella….call me Bella."

" Alright..Bella," She smiles and I actually believe I'm in heaven, " Bella…Swan. The name of beauty isn't it? A beautiful swan." Another blush. Is this girl trying to kill me?!

" umm…no…not really. I'm nothing compared to you…um I mean….ugh.."

This girl is too cute.

"Thanks." she says with a smile. Oh did I say that out loud?

"Yes." she laughs and it's the most beautiful sound I've ever heard.

I've never believed in love at first sight. But I'm starting to. Bella finally sat down next to me and turned her attention to the teacher. I, however, took this opportunity to really get a look at this…this…this amazing girl. Her hair was beautiful, they way it just flowed across her shoulders. How her was had that innocent cute look to it. How her eyes are so beautiful staring into mine….

Shit.

I turn away quickly, too quickly, and mumble a sorry. She laughs again and a warm feeling is spread throughout my body.

A warmth I've longed for.

Could it be real? Could I have actually found love in my love less world? Could I actually be in love with a girl I just met? A human girl? Have I found meaning to this eternal life? Has love really fou-

**brrrririiinnngggggggg!**

The bell takes me away from my thoughts. I look around and see empty desks. Damn I missed her. She left already.

"Hey Alice, you okay?" No apparently she didn't. In fact she hasn't even moved. I nod, answering her question. She doesn't believe me, but she lets it go. Then she smiles again and I believe I've found my answer.

"Well good. I better get going now…" She gets up and makes her way to the door leaving me behind. Then I realize I don't want her to leave. Just yet.

"Wait!… Um.. I could take you to your next class if you want." Please want please want.

"No no I couldn't impose like that…"

" Nonsense! I insist." Really I do.

She smiles again, " Alright since you insist and all." I laugh and grab her arm and lead her away.

_**Thump**_

" So what class you need to go too?"

_**Thump Thump**_

" Um room 15."

_**Thump Thump Thump**_

" Oh that's easy. This way my dear."

_**Thump Thump Thump Thump**_

What the hell is that noise!?! It's so loud and annoying, sounding like a heart….beat….

_shit. Shit. Shit. _

It is a heart beat. A fucking heart beat.

Just what am I doing? Hear with this human? But she's not just any human…no… no.. she's my human.

Mine.

" Ow..hey Alice..my arm."

Mine. Mine mi- Wait what? Oh!

" Shit Bella I'm sorry! I really didn't mean to hurt you."

"It's okay. Really I'm fine." she smiles again and this time I just can't help but lean in. It's so pretty up close….

" Um..Alice?" she squeaks and I've got to say it's such an adorable sound.

" Your eyes. There so… intense and beautiful. Like the rest of you." This time she blushes hard and I can't keep the growl from escaping my lips. Luckily she didn't seem to hear it. I was so wrong before. This girl isn't going to be the death of me.

I'm going to be the death of her.

_**Thump**_

Okay I really need to hunt. Now.

" Oh well here we are. Room 15."

" Thanks." another beautiful smile and I hate to set her go.

" Hey you.. Um.. Want to hang out at lunch?" She asks and I have to hide my surprise.

No she's not like the rest.

I sigh and shake my head, " I'm sorry Bella I would love to, but I'm going home for lunch. I uh.. Forgot my homework." She pouts and I have to bit my lip from reaching out and capturing hers.

" um how about later..like after school?" Seriously am I stupid?

"Okay!" She grins and I chuckle at her excitement.

" Great see you later…Bells."

I dash off before she can reply. I make my way through the halls as the bell rings. Though I don't care. I'm not going to class right now.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

Just what the hell am I doing!? Falling in love with a human? It's true then. I've seriously been screwed by the devil. He's probably laughing his ass off right now. Bastard.

Could I really do this? Be in love with a human? There's so many problems with this. Her blood, her sweet blood…..

Damnit. I didn't want to kill that bunny.

Then there's the fact I want to jump her bones when I near her! And no I'm not talking about sucking her blood. See vampires have very high sex drives. Very high. So yes, I want to have incredibly hot sex with Bella.

Ahh. Got to love lion blood.

This is bound to be the hardest question of my existence.

Yes or No.

No or Yes.

It seems simple enough. I could see myself loving Bella. Kissing Bella. Holding Bella. Calling her mine.

Mine. Mine. Mine.

Yes. Yes. I will make her mine. All mine. Whatever it takes.

_Hey Mr., Mr. Do you see that girl over there? She's quite a beauty. You should ask her to dance, dance. And don't take no for an answer. Tell her one dance, it's all that you ask. So go, go over there and take her hand. And say_

"_**My dear, your quite a beauty**_

_**Standing here all alone**_

_**Let me take upon this duty**_

_**And show you the unknown.**_

_**Give me your hand and you shall see**_

_**The face behind the mirror**_

_**The one who screams and pleas**_

_**As he shakes with terror.**_

_**I'll give you roses that are red**_

_**And candle light surrounding your bed.**_

_**My heart you will receive**_

_**Oh how it already beats for you**_

_**And if you can only believe**_

_**These words they ring true.**_

_**I'll give you gifts full of love**_

_**That myself are unworthy of.**_

_**Now now don't be afraid**_

_**I won't hurt you in anyway**_

_**I'll protect you my beautiful jade**_

_**From the monster that lies a breath away."**_

_Hey Mr. Mr. you got the girl in the end. But will she run when she finds the truth, about the monster that lurks within you. And if she does decided to leave, will you fight for her or let your monster be free to taste the blood is so badly needs._

* * *

A.N./ well there you have it. The next chapter in this story. I just want to say that if anyone feels that Alice and Bella are getting close soon, you are right. But that's the plan. :] This story will develop their relationship, but I have a few twist in store. So keep all that in mind. anyways I hope you all enjoyed. Until next time.

-Broken

Please send some love and review and I'll dance for the people :]


	5. The Face behind the Mirror

A.N./ Well I've finally gotten the chapter written how I want it. So update time :]

Yay. A little announcement, I'm currently looking for a beta so if anyone knows anyone that would really help. Yes I am actually looking, but I haven't had lots of time to look thoroughly.

Disclaimer: I do not own any part of twilight. But I do own a new moon water bottle. :] Team Jacob. (even though it's team Alice that counts)

I'd like to dedicate this chapter to elphabam I really appreciate all your reviews. Made me super happy that you took the time to review more than once. :]

Enjoy

* * *

The Face behind the Mirror

_You don't see what's right in front of you. Your eyes are blinding the truth. Your head is surrounded in lies. You have fallen victim to her disguise. She wears a mask so  
thick you think it's her face. Her eyes that you see filled with love are really empty and bare. Those lips that whisper sweet words are really just lines from a play. She's an  
__ actor, you sweet stupid child. She's a liar, you out played fool. She's the devil and you're her tool._

I feel as if I'm in a fairytale. Birds singing, the sun shining, and all that mushy lovely stuff. I'm living in a castle. I am the queen. A queen who's finally found her king.

My king is a beautiful lady. With her spikey hair and gold eyes.  
My king is my knight. With armor made of the finest material and a sword that pierces bone.  
My king has come to show me a world full of possibilities. A world full of love.

Alice Cullen is my king.

Even if she doesn't know it yet…. But! I will not lose hope so I've decided on a few ways (schemes) to get Alice to be mine.

Plan A: Hire a kidnapper to kidnap her whole family. If she wants them to live she must be mine.

it's a perfect plan.  
_yes yes of course it is…for a psycho  
_shut up. I happen to like my idea  
_it's a stupid idea  
_-Growl- Fine fine.

Plan B: Stand at the edge of a cliff and tell Alice I'll jump if she doesn't give herself to me.

There!! How's that? Not stupid.  
_No of course not. She'll just see you as a maniac.  
_Your not helping at all!  
_You know… this plan sounds very sexual.  
_Ahh!! Fine!!

Plan C: Beg like a dog wanting a treat from it's master. If she doesn't comply whine.

_What are you trying to do, make Alice sound like a pedophile? Do you want to act like a 2 year old?  
_At least I'm coming up with ideas! Tell me what you got oh great one.  
_Just ask her to dinner and a movie.  
_………  
_Ah I knew it was a good idea.  
_I hate you..  
_You really have problems. For one your talking to yourself. And second you hate yourself.  
_UGH!!!

**Bang bang bang**

Ow okay note to self banging head on desk hurts. A lot. I mean seriously, really, who am I kidding? Someone like Alice, a Goddess, going out with someone like me.  
I'm not even worthy to be a peasant! I'm not even worthy enough to say her name.

**Bang**

Just kill me now.  
_Big baby_

**Bang!**

* * *

Lunch couldn't have come at a better time. I'm so hungry. Food. Food. Fo-

Oof!

" Hey are you alright?" Really what's with me running into men all the time!? I mean opposites attract, but this is ridiculous!

Nod. " Yes I'm fine. Sorry about running into you. I really pay more attention to where I'm going. Your not hurt are you?"

"No. No. I'm fine." He laughs. "Besides I'm not the one who fell on my ass."

What's with all these incredibly beautiful people making me blush?

"Um yea.. Sorry bout that."

A chuckle, " you're sorry for falling on your ass?"

" No! I mean yes… I mean.." He chuckles again and I take a moment to look at him. He's got messy hair, like he's ran his hand constantly through it.  
His eyes are a gold color. Which reminds me of Alice…

My king.

After school can not come early enough for I long to se your eyes. How I long to hear your laugh. To feel your lips…  
Umm I mean… -cough, cough-I tend to get lost in my mind a lot so lets pretend I didn't say that. I now realize that the man (boy?) has stopped  
chuckling and is just staring at me with what I'm assuming is suppose to be a charming smile.

Really. What is with guys these days!?

Creepy.

" So again I'm sorry for running into you…I better get going…goodbye."

"Hey wait. I was thinking maybe you wanted some company during lunch." Insert 'charming smile here'

"um thanks, but I'm good." Okay so beautiful can be weird.

Who knew?

* * *

Whoever says time flies is a liar. Time is against me right now. I'm stuck here staring at this clock counting the seconds as they go slowly by.

1

2

3

4

5

3,600

**Briiiinnnnnggggggggg!**

Okay I've changed my mind. Time does fly.  
And I want it back. I can't do this. I'm nothing compared to Alice. She's so different. And I'm so plane. Breath in and out. In and out. In and ou-

"Bella." I can't. I can't. I can't.

"Alice." oh dear god I did not just squeak! Please tell me I didn't just squeak.

She grins and I believe I can't feel my legs anymore. "So my house or yours?" I can't. I can't. I can't.

"Bella? Are you okay?" Concern fills her eyes and I have to try not to hit myself for worrying her. "You still want to hang out…..right?"

"Yes! Yes I do." Relief fills here face and I find her smile contagious.

"That's great. How about your house? It's closer."

I nod and we part to our separate cars. I buckle up and put the keys in the ignition.

Nothing.  
Damnit don't do this. Okay once more.  
Nothing.  
Stupid fucking truck! Stupid stupid stupid stu-

**Knock knock**

" Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!!!" what the hell!? I look over at the window and see Alice laughing. I turn and glare at her.

" You scared the shit out of me!"

"So-sorry Bells" Laugh " you just jumped so high!" She continues laughing and I cross my arms and pout.

" Okay okay. I'm sorry come on lets take my car."

"I just can't leave my car here Alice."

"don't worry I'll just have Edward pick it up."

"How will I get to school tomorrow?"

"I'll pick you up."

"But-"

"Come on Bells lets go." I sigh and follow her to her car. It's a nice car. A very nice car. Okay I super nice car. I so want this car.

"I've met your brother. Edward. He seems….nice."

"Of course he is." She says with a chuckle

" He's was very….persistent. I see why you two are related."

Alice is quiet for a while and I wonder if I said something wrong.

"He likes you. Cause you're so different."

"What?"

"Do you like him too?"

"what? N-"

"Cause I could hook you guys up if you wanted too."

"Hook us u"

"I'll talk to him tonight for you."

"Alice wha-"

"Really it's no big deal. I'll tell him when I get home. Just give me your num-"

"ALICE! Just shut up. What the hell are you even talking about?"

"You and Edward…"

"There is no me and Edward! I just met the guy. By running into him! I never said I wanted to marry him, move to Mexico, and bare his children!"

"But-"

"No buts! If there would be anyone I'd want to marry it would be you!" Shit. I did not just say that. Did I really just say that? Ugh please kill me now.  
I'm going to die. Die. Die. Die. I just told Alice, the Alice Cullen, that I'd marry her.

_Good job genius  
_Not you again. Shut up. This is your fault.  
_My fault!? What the hell did I do!?  
_you should have let me gone with plan A!  
……………….._you're an idiot.  
_Idiot!? Idiot!? I'll show y-

"Well then, where's my ring?"

What? "What?"

"You just cant pop the question like like that without a ring Bells."

WHAT!?!?! " Um..but..I….I mean… er…." Dear god she broke me.

Three seconds of silence ticked by. Three seconds until insane hysterical laughter filled the car.

"Okay okay. it's not that funny!" Alice kept laughing all the way till we reached my house. I, however, spent my time dying in embarrassment.

"I'm sorry Bella, but that was just to funny."

"Humph."

"Oh come on. Don't be like that."

"Humph. Humph."

She grins, " So.. How many children are we having..honey?"

"AHhh!!!" I push the door open and slam it shut behind me. Stupid funny incredibly beautiful girl.

"Hey wait up Bella!" She says with a laugh, following my up to my front door. I put the key in the slot and

**Smack**

Really?!?! I mean come on!

"Oh sorry Bells! I didn't see you there. Well I'm so glad your home. I've got someone here to see you." Charlie turns around and shouts back into the house, "Jacob!"

Jacob?

"You remember Jacob right Bells? You two used to play together when you were young." I look at this boy standing next to my dad. He's seems pretty tall and well built.  
Short hair and a boyish smile on his face.

"Jacob Black?"

His smile gets wider, " Hey Bella! I'm glad you remembered me. It's been a while hasn't it?"

"Yea it has."

"Hey Bella," Charlie interrupts, " Where's your truck?"

"My truck? Oh yea that's right it died. Alice..gave.. Me..a …ride…Oh my god Alice!" I spin around so fast I think I got whiplash. How could I forget about Alice!?  
I grab her arm and pull her up right next to me.

"Dad this is Alice C-"

"Cullen." Jacob finishes for me.

"Um yea, how di-

"Black." Alice interrupts with a …growl? What?

"You guys know each other?"

"More or less." Alice turns towards me. "Look Bella it seems you have company to attend to-"

"Better company than you." Jacob sneers

Alice growls again at Jacob, before turning back to me, "Anyways it seems you have one person already. So maybe we can hang out another day yes?"

"Um sure…."

She smiles, "Great. I'll be here to pick you up in the morning. Later Bells." She leans in and kisses my cheek before dashing off into her car and spending away.  
Jacob mumbles something that sounds like stupid lech before going back into the house. And i'm standing here wondering just what the hell is going on?

Wait. Did Alice Cullen just kiss my cheek? Oh there is a God!  
That was my last thought before I fainted.

_You can see it now can't you? You can see what lies beneath. Beneath the cool velvet lips. Beneath the eyes of love. Beneath the heart that doesn't beat. You see the face  
behind the mirror. The one that's bleeding bright red blood. The face of your love. Your fairytale was just an illusion baby.. There's no such thing as prince charming. And what's  
this talk about you being a Queen? Your just the feast for the beast that lies asleep in her head. When your time comes you'll see, how wrong you were. When your clock seize to  
tick you'll see what you didn't want to believe. Your King is nothing but a thieve. One who hides in the shadows and waits till it's chains be free. You better flee, before the show ends,  
cause once those curtains close all you will do is scream._

* * *

A.N./ Well there we go. The next chapter installed. When Bella is talking the italics is her mind talking back to her. I wanted to introduce Edward and Jacob in this  
chapter for a very important reason. What that reason is you'll just have to stay tuned. Thanks to everyone who reads my story! I love you guys forever. :]

-Broken

P.S. Please review. It will make me happy.


	6. A Devils Voice

A.N./ I'm terribly sorry for taking so long to update. I've been sick and my mom wouldn't let me use the computer. -.- she's a butt head. School is ending pretty quickly  
so hopefully I'll be updating more sooner.

Disclaimer: I do not own twilight or it's characters. I do however own a ticket to a Daughtry concert that I went to. I'm going to frame it. :D

I'd like to dedicate this chapter to DarkBella. Your review was so awesome I tried laughing like I'm some sort of evil insane genius. Thank you for  
your awesome support.

Enjoy

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A Devils Voice

_What makes a killer inhumane? Is it the fact that they kill their own kind? No, that can't be it. Other species kill their own kind, yet we see nothing evil about them. Is it  
because they kill for no reason at all? Or is it cause they kill for every reason in the book? Or is it really because killers show what we all hide inside. Those evil thoughts  
we keep locked away, never even thinking of them. That's the real reason. So the question still remains. What makes a killer inhumane? A person who washes their hands with the blood  
of their victims. A man who craves to hear a women scream. A woman who thrives to make a man bleed. Everyone is a killer. Everyone washes their hands with blood, blood that's stained  
their lives. All humans are inhumane. So what does that make me?_

**Crunch Crunch Crunch**

A mut! A filthy mutt ruined my date with Bella! I can't believe I left her with that…disgusting creature. That filthy bastard!

**Snap Snap Snap**

What I am doing? Seriously I seem to ask that question constantly, but I never have an answer for it.

**Whoosh**

I mean really, me a 108 year old blood sucking _monster_ trying to court a human. I'm seriously fucked up in the head.

**Slurp Slurp Slurp**

Well whatever I'm doing I know I'll never stop. Bella is mine and she will learn that soon enough.

I need, as much as this pains me to say this, help from my family. Or one family member, but the question is who?

Let's see….Rose- yea I'm not even going to go there.

Emmett- Loveable yes. Able to help me woo Bella? No.

Jasper- he would be perfect, but the risk of him biting Bella is to high….besides I wouldn't want to rip off his um…'items'

Edward- the cheeky bastard. Great. He'll love to help me just so he can rub it in my face later. This is what I'm stuck with? Lighting strike me now. Please.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

" You-" Snort " Want my help" snort " To woo Bella?" Edward says in a fit of laughter. The bastard.

" Look Edward. This is hard enough. I mean I don't even know if she likes me! God I'm like a love sick puppy! So maybe you could read her mind for me and-"

" Whoa wait Ali, I'm all for helping you woo-" Chuckle " Bella, but I can't read her mind."

"Come on Edward. I know you don't like reading peoples minds cause it's private and all that, but I really need your he-"

" No, Alice. That's not it. I mean I really _can't_ read Bella's mind. It's like… static."

What?! "What!?" He can't be serious. What am I suppose to do now!? Stupid cheeky bastard.

"Well yes actually I am quite serous. I'm still up for helping you though, although I prefer not to be called names." Smirk

Private my ass Edward. I think while glaring at him.

He laughs. "Well do you want my help or not Ali?"

"What are you going to do if you can't read her mind? Hypnosis?"

"No. Actually I could do something way easier."

"Like what?"

"I could ask her."

"What!?! That's the most stupid plan ever! How does this make you help me!?" Cause really I don't see it.

"Really Ali," he says with a laugh " you really are caught by Bella your head is on back words. _I'm_ going to ask her. Secretly of course."

Ohhhhh….Man I feel stupid now

"Now now Ali, not stupid just uh…thoughtless."

Ugh! Really! Stupid cheeky Bastard.

Edwards laughter fills the room ending the conversations and any talk of wooing Bella. Seriously I hate his power.

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**Tick Tick Tick **

Oh how I despise that infernal clock. How it goes by so slowly.

**Tick Tick Tick **

Edward better be doing his part of the plan. Operation woo Bella cannot fail.

**Tick Tick Tick**

I'm going to burn that clock. Burn it and it's stupid ticking!

**Tick Tick Tick**

There is no God.

**Tick Tick Ti- RINNNNNGGGGGGG**

Finally! Whoa oops. Need to go at a human pace. Alright turn one corner, no Edward. Turn another, still no Edward. Another. Where the hell is he?

" So is tonight good? I'll pick you up say seven?" Was that Edward?

"Are you sure it's okay? I mean I've never even met the rest of your family…let alone been to your house." Bella? Family? House? What in the world…

"Yes, its fine Bella. Trust me, my family will love you. It's not a hard thing to do." Edward says with a wink, causing Bella (_My Bella) _to blush.

What. The. Fuck. Edward is flirting with Bella!? _(My Bella)_ Okay okay I'm just jumping to conclusions. Yes this is all part of the plan. He knows I like (_love)_ Bella.  
This is nothing. There's nothing going on between…them…

No. no. no. no. no. He did not just kiss her cheek. He did not.

**I'll kill him. I'll fucking kill him. How dare he touch my Bella. I'll rip his pretty little head off.**

No. No. I need to just breath. This is nothing. Nothing..

"Thanks Edward. I appreciate your help." Bella walks off with a smile in Edwards direction and he watches her go. Then he glances over at me and smiles.

**I will kill him. I'll burn that smile right off his face. **

"Hey Alice. Great news . I've invited Bella over tonight and…."

**Kill. Kill. Kill.**

" Cause we have a project together and I'm sure you guys can talk and….."

Bella is mine. He knows that. He does..right?

**Mine. Mine. Mine.**

" So what you think?… Alice? Hey are you okay?"

Breathe. Breathe. Just take some deep breaths (even if I don't need them) and calm down. It's nothing. Nothing.

"You know you picked a good choice Ali. I've got to say for a human Bella sure smells _nice. _"

**Slam!**

**Grunt**. " Alice! What the hell are you doin-"

**Bang. **" Shut up!" **Bang. Bang. **"You fucking bastard." **Bang. Bang. Bang. **

" Ali…wait..what-"

" I said shut up!" **Growl **" You Bastard. You know I like Bella! I said she was mine!" **Whoosh. Crash. **

_**Kill. Mine. Kill. Mine. **_

"Ali you need to calm down…"

**Kick. **"Do you not understand when I tell you to shut up!" **Kick. Punch. Kick. Punch. **" You said you'd help me get Bella. Not take her away from me!" **Smash.**

" Ali…please.. I am helping you…"

"Liar!" **Punch. Kick. **

"Alice! Really! Stop it! I'm not trying to take Bella away! I'm just her friend."

Her friend. Friend. Friend. Oh my god….

**Kill. ****Kill. Kill….** I shake my head and blink. Damn….. There is glass everywhere and it's mostly on Edward…

"Oh Edward! I'm so sorry! I don't know what came over me. I just go so angry…"

He rubs his neck and I can see my hand print on it. Did I really do that? And not even realize it? What the hell just happened?

" Eh…" Cough " It's okay Ali, really. You know us sometimes…we just get mad we can't control it. I know you didn't mean it. Really it's okay."  
But it's not and I know it's not.

"Seriously Ali, come on lets go hunt. It will clear your mind a bit." He turns around and head through the doors. I take a step to follow him then take a  
glance at the dented locker and the broken glass on the floor. What the hell happened to me? And why did I lose control?

"Ali." Edward calls me as I shake my head and catch up to him. It was just a fluke. A one time thing. I must be stressed. It won't happen again.

Right?

_Can you hear it? That little voice inside your head, the one that's not yours. The one that calls to you when your alone. The one that makes you pick up the razor blade.  
Or tie the rope around your neck. The voice that makes you pull the trigger or jump off the bridge. It's your voice. Well the monster inside you at least. It's the voice that laughs  
__when you fall. It's the voice that tells you who deserves to die. It's a terrifying voice. A voice that gives you the chills. You try your best to ignore your voice. A __**devils**__ voice. Most  
of the time you succeed. You block it out. You know it's a bad voice, a voice full of death and betrayal. But what do you do when the voice wins? When it overpowers your thoughts and  
makes you see through it's eyes. What do you do when the razor is in your hand? Or when your blood is soaking the floor. What do you do when you destroy everything you love. Or  
kill the one that gives you life. The one that blocks out the voice. You can't __**fight **__once the voice has taken over. You __**can't **__win. It will consume you, in an everlasting darkness. A place  
where the line between insanity and reality seizes to exist. And even __**death**__ will not let you escape that voice. A __**devils **__voice._

_**Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha**_

_-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

Well the next chapter is complete. Sorry it's shorter than the other, I just wanted to get another one up soon. Hope you all enjoyed. Please review and tell me your  
honest opinion I can handle it. Until next time.

- Broken.

P.S. yes I am insane. Its so much fun that way.


	7. Lost Inside

A.N./ Hello readers! Yes I'm updating faster for once isn't that awesome?  
I'd like to thank all my readers who have reviewed and put my story on their  
Favorite story/ story alert list. It makes me so happy to see my inbox fill with emails.

I've decided something and I'd like to share it will you all. I'm dedicating this story (however long it may be) to my  
Beta Reader, and new friend, Eden Storm.

Disclaimer: I do not own any part of twilight. I do however own over 1000 you-gi-oh cards. :D

* * *

Lost Inside

**Run. Run. Run as fast as you can.**

"_**One two I'm coming for you."**_

**Breath. Breath. Breath. Don't stop breathing.**

"_**Three four watch your body hit the floor."**_

**Scream. Scream. Scream till your lungs are raw.**

"_**Five six let's play some tricks."**_

**Pray. Pray. Pray for a God that will never come. **

"_**Seven eight just accept your fate."**_

**Pound. Pound. Pound on every passing door.**

"_**Nine ten I win again."**_

**Cry. Cry. Cry for a lover that's left you for **_**dead.**_

_Can I travel in time, back to a place where I once knew.  
__Let me go I just want to wake up. Can't someone get me out of here?\  
_**Can**_ someone tell me where's my home. _

_Something's chasing me here, I'm just running in circles.  
__Circles through the never ending dark. Where's the light?  
__Where's the exit cause it's never in my sights. I don't even know where I am.  
__Why doesn't anyone save me!? I must be dead. Cause on one's coming.  
_**Someone **_anyone please._

_Have long have I been here? In this place with a monster.  
__Why am I here? Did I do something wrong?  
__Is that on one will come? Is that why no one will  
_**Save me?**

_I don't like it here. It hurts, oh it hurts.  
__Why does it hurt? Not knowing who I am.  
_**I'm **_no one._

_No matter how loud I scream silence is all I here.  
__Please God. Please. In in here, I'm just  
_**dying**_**. **__Rotting away._

_Soon I'll be nothing. I'll be gone. But then what?  
__Will I go to heaven? Will I know who I am?_

_I can look at it this way. Anything is better than here,_

**In the dark. **

_No. Please. No more pain. It hurts. It hurts so much.  
__Lover, my lover, why did you do this to me?  
__You've trapped me here. Here in this place. It's _

**A never ending nightmare.**

_All I did was love you. Want to be with you. Forever and  
__Always. Is this the price I pay for love? _

**Am I really dead?**

_It's a never ending question. I can't seem to answer.  
__Who wishes to die? Those who wish to live? Is this place  
__Really real? _

**Or lost inside me head.**

_No. I'm not dead. You don't feel pain when your dead.  
__Death equals peace. This equals hell. There's no way  
__I can get out. There's no way anyone can get in. _

_So the question is_

**Can anyone save me**

**Before I die?**

* * *

_Tell me how it feels, to be the reason for her screams. Does it break your heart piece by piece. Does make you hate yourself, make you hate the face in the mirror.  
__Tell me, is it a pretty sight? The way her blood drips on the floor. Don't you just want to touch it? One taste or more?  
__Tell me what will you do now? Will you weep like a baby? Will you fall down? It makes no difference to me, dear child, I've won this round._

_So go ahead smash that mirror. Break it like your heart. Show me the anger you feel. The anger I've given you. Scream and cry for your love. The love you've destroyed._

_You know it's true. This is all really your fault. I'm just that voice that lies asleep inside your head. That itch you'll end up scratching. Everyone does.  
Don't feel so bad, my sweet, it will be all better soon. Wait no it won't, I forgot. Nothing will ever be the same cause the only love you've every had has been washed away._

_How does it feel, to lose control when you've had it for so long? It was a rope that would pull and pull till it snapped. I told you, I'd win eventually. I had all the time in the world.  
You've keep me in this cage for so long, like I'm some sort of bird. But I'm worse than that my dear. I'm worse then you'll ever know. Cause no matter how badly you fight_

_I'll always be the one in control._

_**Your nothing but the devil, that's invaded my head. Get out! Get out! Or I'll burn us both into oblivion. Everything you say is a lie, my love will never die.  
My control will be strong again and I will kill you, the voice inside my head.**_

_You kill me? Why you are a hopeless soul. You cannot kill me, for I cannot die without killing yourself. Don't you see? No matter what you do I will always win.  
Don't you see her, laying on the floor? I see her, in her bloody glory. She's broken now. Broken like a doll. It makes me smile, to see the damage take it's toll._

_**You shut up! Just shut up! Your just a voice inside my head. Nothing more! I will kill you! I shall be in control!**_

_Fool! I am you. I've always been you. Just waiting to come out and play. I'm not just a voice inside your head. I'm the monster under your bed. I'm the monster in your closest.  
And on your walls. I'm the monster that's killed your love for once and all. _

* * *

_My body is numb and my heart is cold. The end is near I can fill it oh how I just wish I knew more. I wish I knew what my name is. Or where I came from.  
I'm tired of fighting the pain. I just want it to end. _

_I just want to sleep on a nice warm bed. Or maybe I'd like to stare at the stars or walk along the beach. Anywhere but here is where I wish to be, but one thing  
I remember is that wishing never gets you where you wish to be._

_Tears run down my face, but I do not cry. If I am meant to die here in this place I will die with my head held high. I shall show this monster, that I won't give him what he wants.  
I shall not scream. No matter the cost. _

_Some might say I am a fool, for giving up so easily. But they don't know how it feels to be trapped inside your head. The place you think your safe. The place no one can come in.  
I might die a fool, but at least I'm not living one._

_I feel tired now. So very tired. I will just lay down now. On this cold cold floor. To the people I have forgotten and the lover I know I've left behind do not cry for me.  
Do not give in to the monsters wishes. So him he's not that strong. Show him he will never win again. Show him love beats all. And that he is just a sin._

_Can you see it? I can, the light up ahead. It's warm on my skin. I didn't wish to die, you know, but sometimes the darkness wins._

* * *

_The night when we bid goodbye seems like a dream  
__Memories of yesterday still replay  
__Like a cold wind making me want to scream  
_

_And despite all efforts I grow dismay  
__All cause of a time I cannot redeem._

_With each season's change comes another way  
__To erase one's past with a perfect scheme  
__Which leaves one's forgotten love a mere stray  
__Dulled by the city light, a star bright beam._

_A winter's figure that keeps me at bay  
__Bound with it as it pulls my lost love up stream  
__Sadness in the breeze whispering obey  
__For my pain grows without delay._

_**Why does it hurt so much to say goodbye? Why does my undead heart beat with every unnecessary breath I take? Is it cause or love was real?  
Or is it just the guilt I feel? **_

_**Why does it hurt so much to look in the mirror? Why does it mock me? I didn't mean to fail. I didn't mean to lose control  
This time I didn't just  
lose the battle, I lost the war.**_

_**Why does it hurt to think of you? Why do I only see your blood coating your skin? It tasted like heaven I must admit.  
And that's what the hate grow so big.**_

_**Please love, come back to me. Take my hand and I'll take you away. This monster, this voice inside my head,  
I promise you it will never win again.**_

_**Please love, forgive me for what I have done. For causing you pain. This is worse than death. This is worse than anyone flame.**_

_**Just go away, little voice inside my head. You've done what you've wanted. You've played your little game.  
**__**Just go away, my monster. There's nothing you can do that can compare to this. This heartbreak I feel.  
**__**I'm suppose to see the future. I'm suppose to know when it's going to rain. But not this time. This time I didn't see the storm before it began.**_

_**My love if you come back to me I swear. I'll defeat my monster that lies within my head. I'll show you how much I love you, forever,  
just wake up and take my hand.**_

_The night when we bid goodbye seems like a nightmare  
__Memories of your eyes fill my head  
__Like a cold wind, I was so unaware _

_And the times that's past I still watch you bleed  
__All cause I didn't see what was right in front of me_

_With each breath I take comes another way  
__To ignore the pain in my undead heart  
__Which leaves me lost and gray  
__Wishing my love will never depart_

_A winter's figure that keeps me at bay  
__Bound with it as it keep my love from me  
__Sadness in the air whispering betray  
__For the monster I've set free._

* * *

Please Review :]


	8. Lions Den

A.N. / Yes another chapter. I'm glad those who liked the last chapter told me so, whether it was through review or putting my story on their favorite story list.  
You readers make my day. I especially want to thank my Beta Reader, Eden Storm. You've helped me become a better write. So thank you.

Disclaimer: I don't own twilight; I do however own a very awesome FMA pocket watch. (Those who don't know what FMA is…you just break my heart…..) Ha-ha

Enjoy

* * *

Lions den

_I was never one to believe  
__In love at first sight  
__My heart fills with glee  
__Knowing I'll see you tonight_

_My body aches for your touch  
__it's an overwhelming need  
__To feel your flesh against mine  
__It's an addiction if you please_

_Your breath, it's hot  
__Against my lips  
__One would guess not  
__How badly I crave your kiss_

_My body crumbles  
__From the pressure of your hands  
__If this is what heaven feels like  
__Then I don't ever want to land_

_Your lips, are cold  
__Against my skin  
__One would guess not  
__How I know this is a sin_

_I was not one to believe  
__In happily ever after  
__That's because I know  
__That love is full of lies_

_For I was blinded by beauty  
__So I didn't see myself fall  
__In love with a monster  
__That had no soul._

_"Bella."_

Huh?

_"Bella. Wake up."_

What?

_"Come on. Open your eyes."_

My head was throbbing with pressure as I sat up. I opened my eyes to a bright room. So bright I have to shut my eyes to stop the pressure building.

"There you are."

I look ahead of me to see Jacob smiling.

Wait Jacob…Alice…the kiss…darkness.

KISS!?!

Holy fuck. Alice Cullen kissed me. Sure it was on the cheek, but I still felt that tingle.

No, I still felt that burn.

"You feeling okay?"

"Yea. Just a bit dizzy."

"I suspected that. Geez Bella you scared the crap out of me."

I felt myself blush " sorry. I didn't plan to faint you know. Where's Charlie?"

"He got called to the police station. Something about an attack or something…"

"Oh. Did Alice call while I was out?"

Jacob growls, "No."

She left I remember that. But why? We were going to hang out then Jacob showed up…

Jacob!

I stand up quickly and point an accusing finger at Jacob, "What did you do?!"

Shock fills his face as he takes a step back, "What are you talking about Bella? I didn't do anything."

"Yes you did. Because of you Alice left. "

Snort, "Well good. She should have never came over in the first place."

"What is your problem with Alice?"

"She's no good."

"How do you know?" I raise my eyebrow.

"Cause I just do."

Snort "That's bullshit Jacob."

"Look Bella I know what I'm talking about. Alice Cullen," he hisses, "Is no good and that's why I forbid you from seeing her."

"Alice is completely harm..less…. Wait... WHAT!?"

"You heard me."

"Since when are you my father?"

"Since I know what's good for you."

"Look here Jacob black," I poke his chest with my finger, "I don't care if you are the king of England, you do not tell me what I can and can not do."

"I'm just looking ou-"

"I do not care. I happen to like Alice a lot whether you care is not my concern."

"You can not be her friend-"

"I wasn't asking your permission. Besides I plan to be more than her friend."

Jacob's jaw drops, "you can't be serious."

"I'm deadly serious."

Growl "you don't know anything about her!"

"Neither do you!"

"I will not allow this!"

"Tough Shit! Now I'm done with this and I'm done with you. If you want to be my friend you can call me when you get  
that stick out of your ass."

"No."

"Excuse me"?

"I will not let you try anything with that…that _thing_!"

"Thing!? Alice is not a thing!"

"She's a monster!"

**Smack**

"Get out."

"W-what?"

"I said get the fuck out. You don't have the right to be within five feet of me right now."

Jacob opened and closed his mouth before stomping to the door. He looked over his shoulder at me and I could see the pain in his eyes,  
but I was far to pissed to care. I reached around him and opened the door. He stepped out and turned around to look at me once again.

"You'll regret this later Bella."

"Goodbye Jacob," I said as I slammed the door in his face. Who does he think he is anyways? Saying all that about Alice?

Still… It does make me wonder… Alice is different from anyone I've met before. I never see her eat. She's always so cold. She flinches away from me when I blush.

And those eyes.

Part of me knows Jacob was right, I don't know anything about Alice.

_What secrets are she hiding?_

_What's the reasons for her cold skin?_

_Her flawless body? Her golden eyes?_

_What things hasn't she told me?_

And the most important question of all..

**Can I really handle the truth?**

* * *

"_Wait up Alice! (laughs) Wait up!"_

"_Hurry up Bells. We don't got all day! We've got to hurry!"_

"_You run so fast! Where are we going anyways!?"_

"_Just come on! Before the sun sets!"_

"_What's the sun go to do with anything!?"_

_**Huff huff **__"It's not the sun that's important…." She replies before disappearing ahead of me. I try catching up, but I run out of breath and  
stager against a tree. I call out for Alice again. No answer, just the wind._

"_It's the night that's important." Alice says right behind me and I jump._

"_Geez Alice you scared me shitless!" (laughs) "what about the night?"_

_Alice doesn't reply just stares at me with her golden eyes._

"_Alice?"_

_Again she doesn't reply, just stares at me and smiles. I see fangs appear from her mouth. _

_She walks towards me just smiling an.. Evil smile._

"_A-Alice? W-what are you doing?"_

"_I told you," She says with a smirk, "We didn't have all day."_

"_What are you talking about? What's going on? Your..your freaking me out."_

_She laughs a laugh I once thought was beautiful, but now it just sends shivers along my spine._

"_Oh oh my dear sweet Bella. Do you think I really loved you? No no my sweet clueless Bella. I just used you to get what I wanted. To get what I craved."_

_Jacobs words rang in my head __**you're going to regret this later Bella….. **__and for once I'm wishing I listen to him._

"_W-what is it that you want?"_

"_Your life." She says before lunging for my neck._

* * *

I awoke with a start. Sweat coated my body and I shook with a terrible shiver. It was just I dream. A horrible evil dream. Just a dream…

A dream.

I shake my head to get remove the remainders of the dream. Jumping out of bed I head for the bathroom for my morning shower. The water was cold at first,  
which I hate, but when it finally got warm enough I stripped and stepped in. I don't know why, but for some reason I had a feeling today would be an interesting day.

After my shower, I went back into my room. I shivers as myfeet hit the cold wood floor and surprisingly manage not to trip on thin air. Cause you know, as  
accident prone as I am, it tends to happen a lot. I picked out a pair of red skinny jeans, with my Harry Potter shirt, my black converse, and my pocket watch.

It was a cloudy day, as normal, so just in case I also threw on my jacket. (Harry Potter of course) Grabbed my messenger bag and was out the door with  
exactly ten minutes to get to school.

I turned on the radio in my rusty beat up old truck.( Just don't tell her I said that or she'll break down. And I do not wish to walk all the way to school. Hell No.)

"_Good Morning Seattle. It's a beautiful day once again and if you're just joining us welcome to the commercial free hours. We've got some new songs for you guys.  
So without further wait, here's Daughtry with their new hit 'Life after you.' Enjoy."_

_**Ten miles from town and I just broke down  
Spittin' out smoke on the side of the road  
I'm out here alone just tryin' to get home  
To tell you I was wrong but you already know**_

_**Believe me I won't stop at nothin'  
To see you so I've started runnin'**_

_**All that I'm after is a life full of laughter  
As long as I'm laughin' with you  
I'm thinkin' that all that still matters is love ever after  
After the life we've been through'  
Cause I know there's no life after you**_

_**Last time we talked, the night that I walked  
Burns like an iron in the back of my mind  
I must've been high to say you and I  
Weren't meant to be and just wastin' my time**_

_**Oh, why did I ever doubt you?  
You know I would die here without you**_

_**All that I'm after is a life full of laughter  
As long as I'm laughin' with you  
I'm thinkin' that all that still matters is love ever after  
After the life we've been through  
'Cause I know there's no life after you**_

_**You and I, right or wrong, there's no other one  
After this time I spent alone  
It's hard to believe that a man with sight could be so blind  
Thinkin' 'bout the better times, must've been outta my mind  
So I'm runnin' back to tell you**_

_**All that I'm after is a life full of laughter  
Without you God knows what I'd do, yeah**_

_**All that I'm after is a life full of laughter  
As long as I'm laughin' with you  
I'm thinkin' 'bout all that still matters is love ever after  
After the life we've been through, yeah  
Know there's no life after you  
**_

_**Know there's no life after you  
Know there's no life after you  
Know there's no life after you  
Know there's no life after you  
Know there's no life after you  
Know there's no life after youKnow there's no life after you, yeah**_

"yes there's no life after you. La la la la-"

" Hello Bella."

"Geez Edward! You scared the crap out of me. I mean seriously what is with everyone doing that!?" **thump Thump **went my heart

He Chuckle. "Oh I'm sorry Bella. You do realize you've been singing that song for the last minute right?"

I blushed. "really? Oh um.. No I didn't notice."

"Yes well come along now the bell is about to ring. Wouldn't want to be late would we?" Edward replied with a smile.

"No of course not. Let's go." Normally I wouldn't see Edward till 3rd period, but since some freshman were taking State testing some of us older classes got to  
skip 1st and 2nd period, which I'm very mad about because now I don't get to see Alice until lunch. Which is totally not cool. Hmph.

"So Bella," Edward continued as we sit down in our seats. "I was wondering, if you like anyone here at school?"

Uh….. "Maybe…. Why do you ask?" Please don't like me please please please please…

"Cause well I have this… friend who likes you and sh- I mean this friend doesn't know if they have a chance or not."

"You know…. Edward I think you're a great guy and all…"( Kind of creepy actually…..) " but I mean I just like you as a fri-" I was cut off by Edwards laughter  
which in turn caused the teacher to glare at us and basically tell us to zip it. Eh _stupid old hag_

Edward finally stopped laughing after I glared at him for 5 minutes. I was about to ask him what the hell he was laughing at when the teacher, wicked witch, spoke.

"Now class pay attention. I have some important news. Instead of doing a big test this chapter we're going to do a project," Groan " Yes, well anyway,  
I've decided to be nice and let you pick your own partners, but if anyone fuc- I mean messes around you will get an automatic F. Now lets turn to page 3 in the text book and fo……."  
I zoned out after that.

Great now I'm going to have to find a partner to work with. This is so not cool. I banged my head on the desk a couple times before Edward tapped me on the shoulder.

"You know Bella. We could be partners. Unless you wish to work with Mike…."

"Oh dear god no! Please be my partner!"

"Alright alright, partner." He answerd with a laugh which reminds me….

"Hey! What were you laughing about earlier?"

"Oh that," Chuckle. " I don't like you Bella. Well I mean I do, but not like that. When I say I have a friend, I really mean a friend."

OH! Man I feel like an idiot….. "Oh….so.. Well who's this friend?"

"First you never answered my question. Do you like anyone?"

Should I tell him? I mean Alice is his sister after all. But maybe he could help me learn more about her…hopefully. "yes…"

"really?" he askes with a.. okay was that a squeaky pitchy voice? Or was it just me? (Seriously is this guy gay or what?)

"Uh yea……"

"Who?"

"You promise not to tell anyone right?"

"Yes, yes."

"I'm serious here Edward. I mean it. You can't tell a soul."

"I know, I know just tell me who."

Okay deep breath you can do this and go, "It's Alice."

"Seriously?!" whoa buddy that was a little to loud.

"Yes!" I practically hiss "Just keep it down will you?"

"Sorry sorry. That's just awesome Bella."

"I don't think so, I mean it's Alice. She's like a Goddess or something."

I sighed, adding "I mean the way her hips move when she walks and the way  
her hair is just spikey and her beautiful smile and the way her lips look in the light-"

"Steady Bella that's my sister your thinking perverted thoughts about. Not something I want to imagine okay? But I'm really happy for you.  
I think you might just have a chance."

What! "Are you serious? She likes me? She told you?"

"I'm not saying anything, but you should just go for it. Look since we're going to be partners why don't you come over today after school?  
We can start our project and you can get closer to Alice."

"Bu-" **Briiinnnngggggggggggg** My answer was cut short by the bell ringing.

"Here I'll walk with you and we can talk some more."

I nod my head in agreement and follow Edward out of class. We walk a couple halls all whilechatting causally. He's not such a bad guy (once you get over the creepy aspect). He may be the best way I can spend more time with Alice.

"So tonight? I'll pick you up at seven?"

"Are you sure it's okay? I mean I've never met the rest of your family. Let alone been in your house."

"Yes trust me Bella. My family will love you. It's not a hard thing to do." Edward says with a wink, making me blush.

"Well I better go, don't be late to class partner and don't worry you'll get the girl." He says before kissing my cheek. I kiss his cheek and whisper  
thank you in his ear before heading off to my next class.

Tonight will be my first night of getting closer to the mystery that is Alice Cullen and I will need to prepare myself. The rest of the day couldn't have gone fast enough.

But has I reached my next class the dream kept replaying inside my head. I don't know why. I mean it was just a dream.

Right?

_I can hear the wind  
__Whispering through the trees  
__It's saying run girl run  
__For this is not a dream  
__It's your worst nightmare  
__That's about to become reality_

_I just shake me head  
__While looking into your eyes  
__All I can see is the love the shines  
__And I know it's all for me_

_So we'll dance with the music  
__And we'll swing to the beat  
__This is our fairytale  
__Which has to have a happy ending._

_What I didn't see  
__Was the place I was in  
__I've stumbled into the lions den  
__And there's no way home_

_But I'm blinded by the moonlight  
__That makes you sparkle  
__I'm hypnotized  
__By your brilliant smile_

_So we'll dance to the beat  
__And swing to the music  
__Cause I'm in the lions den  
__And the nightmare's about to begin._

* * *

A.N. I've never done that much dialogue in one chapter. So please please tell me how I did. I've never had confidence in my dialoged. All reviews are welcome  
and I hope everyone enjoyed. Merci for my loyal readers. This one's for all you guys.

Oh just in case I get sued I do not own the song my Daughtry or the rights to Harry Potter. I do however own the jacket and a shirt I mentioned.

-Broken

p.s. OKAY so I've changed the French to English. I tried to be cool and it didn't work. I got like 3 reviews telling me it was spelled different ways. SO now  
I'm going to go cry in a coner. Merci. (I KNOW FOR A FACT THAT MEANS THANK YOU -.-)


	9. Juliet and Juliet

A.N./ Well hello readers! I'm so happy cause I got such positive feed back last chapter. Thank you all for reviewing and putting my story on your favorite stories/story alert list.  
Also those of you who put my on your favorite authors. I consider that a great accomplishment.

Disclaimer: I do not own twilight, I do however own an awesome Beta Reader. (Yes Eden I own you…mahahaha…)

Once again this is dedicated to my friend and loyal Beta Reader Eden Storm. You're just the best mate ever! You dig? :]

Enjoy

* * *

Juliet and Juliet

_We feast on the flesh  
__That thrives on your bones  
_

_We suck the blood  
__That pumps in your veins_

_We crush the heart  
__That gives you life_

_**I **__kill your soul  
_'_Till your empty inside_

_**How does it feel, to be the danger she fears? **_

_**To be the monster under her bed? **_

_**To be a killer in your head?**_

_**How does it feel, to lead her to her death? **_

_**Is it painful? **_

_**Or does it give you rest?**_

_**How does it feel, to hold her close? **_

_**To feel her heart beat against your chest? **_

_**To know one twitch could be her end?**_

_**But no matter what you feel,  
**__**No matter what you wish…  
**__**You'll always be the reason,  
**__**Her life seized to exist…**_

_Like a spider or snake  
__You called her in  
__Like a rat or a fly  
__You drank her thin_

_So now you sit  
__With your head in your hands  
__Crying no tears  
__For your Juliet's drowned_

_Oh Romeo oh Romeo  
__Place the dagger down  
__Oh Romeo oh Romeo  
__Raise your head now  
__Oh Romeo oh Romeo  
__All you should ask  
__Oh Romeo oh Romeo  
__Why did you crash?_

_Oh Juliet dear Juliet  
__Why art though so blind?  
__Oh Juliet sweet Juliet  
__You've lost your mind._

_**One would ask  
**__**Why love is such a tragedy  
**__**So I would question  
**__**How else could one be happy?**_

Bella.

Edward.

Bella.

Me.

Home.

Family.

Bella.

_Jesus. _

What to do?

What am I to do?

Should I dress nice?

Should I clean my room?

Should wear makeup?

Should I do my hair?

What to do, **what to do?**

Edward is a sly fool, I'll give him that. A crazy insane, but loveable, fool. But seriously now Bella (my sweet Bella) is coming over tonight! Oh for heavens sake!

"You can't _seriously _allow this Carlisle ."

" It's for school Rosalie. I don't see what the problem is."

"For school my ass! You know Edward doesn't care about school projects! He's just helping Alice get Bella."

" Well yes that may be true, but you know Alice. She seems happy now that Bella appeared in her life."

"I know she's happy! But Bella is still a human! You know the Voltaire will not allow this! There _are _rules!"

Carlisle raised a perfect eyebrow " Bella is coming over and that's final."

I heard Rosalie humph followed by thundering footsteps up the stairs. A door then slammed shut as Esme called, "Don't slam the door Rosalie Hale!"

I felt anger pulsing through my body. So what if Bella is a human! She's my human! And if little piss prick is too stuck up to let me be happy then she can burn in hell!

"You know she wants you to be happy darling." Jasper said from the window pane behind me.

"I know," I replied with a sigh, " It's just I'm finally happy for once. Why can't she accept that?"

Jasper got up and wrapped his arms around me in a confronting hug. Out of everyone in the family he understood me the most. Maybe it was because he could feel emotions,  
but I'd like to think we just click.

"I don't know darling, but she'll get over it. Just know the rest of the family is happy for you."

That instantly made the anger leave my body, but the sadness I felt still lingered.

"What if she doesn't feel the same way about me?"

"She does."

"How do you know that? Edward can't read her mind and you can't tell what she's feeling unless it's one emotion." Bella sure was an interesting human.

_Very interesting_

" I know because I see the way she looks at you. It's the same way Emmet looks at Rose. Or Carlisle looks at Esme. It's a look full of love. You just have to  
show her how you feel. I mean she is just human after all." Jasper finished with a slight chuckle

"Thanks Jasper," I replied with a smile turning in his arms I wrapped mine around him.

"Anytime darling. Anytime."

I kissed Jasper's cheek as he left the room. My phone started vibrate on my desk.

_Ali, I'm in Seattle. Car broke down. Can't pick Bella up tonight. So I texted her and told her to still go to the house. Have fun. : ) _

_-Edward_

Like I said. Sly bastard.

* * *

**Ding Dong**

She's here. Okay Breath in and out, in and out. Can vampires hyperventilate? Because I think I'm doing that right now.

"Welcome to our home Isabella. Alice! Bella is here!"

I walked (well, more ran) down the stairs and saw Bella in her shining glory.

"Bells. It's good to see you again. You look great."

She blushed and for once I'm glad Jasper. " Thanks Alice. You look good too. I mean great. You look great."

"Thanks." I replied with a smile.

Bella shifted from one foot to the other while casually glancing out of the corner of her eye. "So, where's Edward?"

"Oh yea…well you see Edward's car broke down and he can't make it.." Sly bastard.

"oh. Well then I guess I came over for no reason.. I should really go.." She hesitated before turning to the door. I reached out to stop her before her hand touched the doorknob.

"Wait. You can stay if you want.. We can.. Um I mean you can hang out with me.."

Please say yes. Please say yes..

"Yes! Um I mean sure." Bella quickly replied

Wow that was quick..maybe Edward was right. Maybe she does like me back.

_Perfect stupid human._

"Great! Let's go up to my room. Unless you want to stay down here.. With the family…and Rosalie…."

Bella shook her head no so fast I'm afraid she might get whiplash. Rosalie growled from the kitchen but I ignore her. She'll get over it.

I climb the stairs with Bella in tow and we come upon my door which says 'ALICE' is gold letters across it.

"Very you Alice." Bella says with a laugh.

"Glad you like it. Now come on." I open the door and Bella softly gasp behind me. My room is very elegant. It looks more like a fancy café than a bedroom.  
I have a book self along one wall with hundreds of books. (most of them are shopping catalogues, but hey even vampires need hobbies.) A stereo sits on top of my  
dresser, which is wood painted black with gold stars. I have a couch instead of a bed. (for obvious reason) It's an old 60's couch that looks worn down and finished.  
I like it that way. I also have a television mounted on the wall and a walk in closet.

My favorite part of my room though, is the walls. They are covered in paintings and drawings. Drawings I did of my family, the trees, birds, dogs, ca-"

"Hey Alice. What's this one?" Bella asked interrupting my thoughts. She's staring at a recent drawing I did. Lightly gliding her fingers across it.

It was a drawing of a meadow. Where the meadow is, I have no idea. I saw it in a vision. Now that I remember it was actually a strange vision. One I had just before  
I saw Bella. The meadow was beautiful. It was surrounded by trees and covered in flowers. You could see the sky perfectly and along the grassy banks ran a river  
or a stream that was just gorgeous. It really was one hell of a vision.

"Oh that little thing? I just saw it in a vi- dream one night. So I decided to draw it. You like it?"

Bella doesn't say anything just keeps staring at the picture with a slight frown on her face.

"Bella?" I ask and still her attention is on the picture. I walk up behind her and put my hand on her shoulder. She jumps and spins around.

"Are you alright?"

"Huh? Oh yes sorry. I just.. Got lost in the picture. You draw really good Alice." She finished with a smile and I can't help but notice how she smells

so _delicious. _I unknowingly lean in a little closer and I can hear Bella's heart speed up.

"Alice…."

The way my name just rolls off her lips sends shivers down my spine. Vampires don't shiver.

"Bella…"

We stare at each other for what seemed like forever until the moment I would come to remember and regret for the rest of eternity.

Our lips touched and the fire was set a blaze. It was the most _amazing _feeling I have ever felt. One beautiful sin.

_**And the game begins. Hahaha**_

_To be or not to be  
__Is not the question I seek  
__To love or not to love  
__Would be the riddle I speak_

_Do I embrace your lips  
__In a soft sweet kiss?  
__Do I take your hand  
__And intertwine our fingers?  
__Do I call you mine  
__Forever, even after time?_

_To love or not to love  
__I must know  
__To run or not to run  
__Can I really say no?_

_To be or not to be  
__To love or not to love  
__To run or not to run_

_These question fill my head  
__Leaving me without answers  
__A feeling of dread  
__So I call to you  
__When the light is gone  
__And I hope you can hear  
__My silent song_

_My dear Juliet  
__When the time may come  
__I hope you will forgive me  
__For all that I have done_

_And may your heart  
__Seized to beat  
__I hope you will give me  
__A chance to repeat  
_

_For I know I love you  
__I can not lie  
__But my monster craves you  
__So you must die_

_And when your buried  
__Underneath the ground  
__Float up to heaven  
__And I'll meet you there  
__Somehow._

_But until we meet  
__You can be my angel  
__The light I can not touch  
__As I stay here, down below  
__Wishing, always wishing_

_**I had more control. **_

* * *

There you are, the next chapter. I hope everyone liked it and no one gets mad at me for making it so short. It's on purpose I promise the next  
chapter will be huge!

Please review

-Broken


	10. Endlessly

A.N./ I'm so happy everyone loved the last chapter. Big Thanks to everyone who has reviewed. Seriously I've accomplished over 50 reviews on one story. You guys don't know how happy that makes me feel. I love ALL my readers.

Jezikial: First off thank you for your review. It made me smile and also grin mischievously. Jezikial commented that the prologue pretty much tells readers that this will end on a sad note. All I have to say is muhahahaha. My plan is working perfectly….. *grins*

Shaz89: I can't tell you what happens…you'll just have to find out. But don't worry it won't be to long…

Disclaimer: As you all should know by now I do not own twilight. I do however own two gold fish. Who I love very much.

Again I'd like to thank my Beta Reader, Eden Storm. Without you I'd be just a lonely young snapper takin snaps and wafflein all day. haha (you got to love  
thos Brits!) And even if you put milk in your tea, your still the best mate ever. :]

Without further delay I give you the next chapter.

Enjoy

* * *

Endlessly

_Like a Shadow in the moonlight, she walks  
__Across the darkened streets, she hears  
__The howl of the wind and the whisper of the trees, Alone  
__She must walk, for her love she must see._

_To the place where her love once lived  
__She must go now, to win back  
__Her love and her heart,  
__Which shattered like glass, breaking within._

_Now she must beg for her forgiveness  
__Only hoping she will hear her cry  
__The young girl walks this endless night  
__Watching the moonlight begin to die._

_Almost to her love, she prays she will see  
__That all she ever did was love her, Endlessly  
__She wants her to know, that she will always be her love  
__And the heart she calls hers, is hers no more._

_But what fate has done, the young girl doesn't know  
__That her love is Dead, only a ghost, white as snow.  
__Her heart shatters, when she hears  
__That true love is gone, and will never be hers_

_So she puts the gun to her chest  
__Takes her last, deep, shallow breath  
__For this is for her love, now she knows  
__That she must become a ghost, white as snow._

_They say the shot stopped the howl of the wind  
__And put ease to the whisper of the trees  
__For it made the moon, seem not so bright  
__In the moonlight of that endless night.  
__It rang in the ears of the dead, you see  
__Her love did hear her cry, which put her at peace_

_Like a ghost in the moonlight, she walks  
__Across the bare and darkened streets, she hears  
__The howl of the wind and the whisper of the trees, alone  
__She will always be, a ghost white as snow  
__Wanting her only true love to see, how she loves her  
__**Endlessly**_

There is a God.

There are angles.

I _am _in heaven.

Sweet, sweet heaven.

A heaven that I never want to leave. Unfortunately I _still _need to breath. I _reluctantly _pulled away from Alice, resting my forehead against hers, gasping quietly for air.

I've just kissed the girl of my dreams. Maybe I am dreaming.

_I swear if this is a dream I will die. _

I seriously will kill myself. I'll jump of a cliff. Or run in front of a car. Or-

"Bella." Alice whispers, her breath across my lips.

"Yea?" I asked, in a daze.

"Are you alright?"

_Am I alright? _

I mean I've just kissed this angle, no this goddess…

_Hell yes I'm alright…_

"Yes. I'm great actually."

"Really?

I nodded.

You don't know how happy it makes me feel to hear that." she continued, also with a smile.

"I think I know. I've been wanting to do that since I first saw you." I confess, breaking our eye contact and I start to at my shoes. What? They're a pretty color….

"So have I." Alice says quietly making me raise my head and stare into her eyes in disbelief.

"Really?"

"Yes, in fact I'd like to do it again."

My reply? Well let's just say I've become a fan of not having any air. Alice's lips were so cold, but so warm at the same time. All thoughts flew out of my  
head in that moment. A moment of Alice and me. Me and Alice. Together in one perfect harmony.

A moment I'd remember forever.

A moment where my dream that was a picture on Alice's wall seized to exist. A picture that would change my life.

Forever.

"Tell me why you moved to Forks." Alice asked propping herself up on an elbow. We were sitting on her floor (since for some reason she lacked a bed…)  
ending up there after getting to know each other in the best way possible. (Kissing you know?)

"Well it's kind of a long story and I don't want to bore you." I answered.

_Really I just want to kiss you again and again and again…_

She smiled again "You won't bore me, I promise. I want to know who Bella Swan is."

" Alright," I start with a sigh, " I used to live with my mom in Arizona and-"

"Wait if you lived in Arizona why are you so pale?" she questioned, eyebrows raised.

"Do you want to know or not?" I asked, raising my own.

"Okay okay sorry." Alice says with a giggle kissing my cheek briefly.

I roll my eyes and try to keep the blush from my face.

"Now as I was saying. I lived with my mom. I could tell she was pretty lonely and she didn't like the fact that I was going to go off to college soon. Anyways  
she dated around, but most of the guys left once they learned she had a kid. Until she meet Phil. He was a baseball player so he moved around a lot. I could  
tell mom liked him a lot, but she didn't want to move me around constantly. Well to make a long story short I told her that I wanted to move in with Charlie, because  
I missed him. And here I am."

"That's very kind of you Bella. Giving up your home for your mother's happiness." Alice said giving me a quick peck on the lips.

I felt myself blush, "So if I tell you I saved a dog from a wild cat would you do that again?"

Alice laughed and I knew in that instant I was in love. In love with this beautiful gorgeous goddess I didn't even know.

_In love with this mystery._

"You really are something else Bells."

"Thanks," I replied with a smile. "So tell me about you and your family. I'd like to get to know the infamous Alice Cullen."

Alice scrunched her face slightly.

"There's not much to know. We're all adopted and we live together."

"There's got to be more than that. What about your childhood? Your parents?"

" Aren't you hungry? Shouldn't it be time for you to eat? Let's order some pizza. What kind of toppings do you like?" Alice quickly interrupted.

"Alice.."

"Oh! That's the phone. Be right back."

Alice flew out of the room before I could stop her. I mean really I didn't even hear a phone ring? I don't know what's wrong with Alice, but she's hiding  
something. And if this, if we, are going to go anywhere I don't ant any secrets.

I follow the stairs down to the living room looking for Alice. I come across Emmet playing a video game and Jasper reading a book.

But no Alice.

I wave to both of them, not really caring if they notice, and go into what I hope is the kitchen.

It is, but I still don't see Alice anywhere. I continue on until I come to a door (which I'm assuming is the back door). As I go to open it I hear Alice arguing with someone.

"She needs to know if your going to start anything with her."

"She doesn't need to know! I can handle it."

"I'm not saying you can't Ali, I'm just saying I think it's best you tell her."

"I can't tell her. What if I lose her?"

"You're going to lose her if you lie to her."

"You know," A voice said from behind me, causing me to jump, "It's not very polite to ease drop on people's conversations."

"Um.. Yes, sorry.." I tried making my way past her, but she blocked my path.

"It's also _impolite _to not say excuse me."

"Right, right I'm sorry. Excuse me." I rushed passed this person quickly and mumbled (what I thought was under my breath) bitch.

Let me tell you, this was **the **worst thing to do. Before I knew it I was pushed (quite hard) against the kitchen door with a hand around my throat.

"Listen here you _worthless _mortal. I do not and will never like you. Nor will I ever consider you any part of this family. Whether you're with Alice or not.  
So I suggest you learn your place or I will sh-"

Before she could finish, she was instantly thrown backwards followed by a large BOOM.

I sank to the floor in shock.

As I sat on the floor all I could hear was the beating of my heart and thunder.

**BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!**

The noise rang in my head causing me to grab my head in pain. It was so loud! Too loud. A whimper escaped my lips before I could stop it and before I  
could blink Edward was standing in front of me.

"Bella? Bella are you ok? Bella can you hear me? Come on let's get you home."

"Home? No, no where's Alice?" I whispered.

"She's uh busy come on Bella you fell and hit your head. Let's get you home."

"Fell? I didn't fall. No, no that girl, she pushed me. Then the booming… ohh my head. Where's Alice? Alice!"

"Come on Bella you'll see her tomorrow." Edward continued, a look of concern on his face.

I shook my head almost violently.

"NO. Alice! Alice!"

Edwards grip on my arm loosened quickly as another BOOM echoed in my head. I stayed steady on my feet, barley, and tried to focus my sight. I look around  
and I see Edward on the floor staring up at… Alice.

But that was not Alice. Alice was beautiful, kind, lovely, and looked like an angel.

That was a _monster. _

I felt my headache increase ten-fold as the pain became too much. The booming was just echoing in my ears and the pressure in my head felt so intense.

"Alice…" I whimpered in pain, leaning against a desk. Instantly her head snapped over to me and the _monster _in her eyes was replaced with concern. She was  
by my side in the next second holding me close to her.

"Oh Bella I'm so sorry. What hurts? What's wrong?"

"My head….Please make it stop…please."

"Shh shh it's okay Bells it's okay." Alice picked me up and before I knew it I was lying on her couch in her room. My head hurt so much I didn't realize that she  
moved way to fast. Impossibly fast.

Alice left and was soon back again. She placed a cool ice bag on my head. The booming quieted down, but the pounding still remained. Alice sat on the floor by  
my side, softly playing with my hair. Within ten minutes the pounding dropped down to a little pressure and the pain lessoned.

Realization dawned on me, but before I could start questioning Alice she spoke.

"I'm so sorry Bella…I didn't mean for you to get hurt. But I can't tell you what you want to know."

"What? I like you Alice, but I don't want any secrets between us."

"Neither do I Bella, please trust me. I just can't tell you, it's against the rules."

_Rules. __Rules. Rules. __Rules…._

"Rules what rules? You moved faster than anything possible! Rosalie called me a mortal! And to top it all off I saw _fangs _from your mouth! FANGS ALICE!  
Now you tell me what the fuck is going on right now or I'm leaving!"

Alice stayed silent and I had to fight back the tears that threatened to fall.

"I though you were different." I said getting up, then quickly falling back down on the couch. Alice shot up to help me, but I pushed her arm away.

"I'm going home. When you want to tell me the truth you can call me."

I marched out of the room (okay walked very slowly, for I still had a headache..). Down the stairs and out the front door. I saw Edward leaning against the  
driver side door of my car.

"What do you want Edward?"

"Bella, you're in no condition to drive. So I'll take you home. Don't worry I'll have Emmet drop your truck off in the morning."

I didn't argue because my head was still hurting. I walked over to Edward and the passenger side door, and slide in. Slowly I rested my head on the window  
trying to control my head from bursting.

"She really can't tell you Bella. She wants to be with you, but she can't say a word."

I remained silent staring out the window. We pull up to my house a couple minutes later and I get out. Before I shut the door Edward grabs my arm, holding me back.

Edward continued.

"She wants you to know, but she can't tell you. So it's up to you to find the answers you seek. Think back to the beach and the old stories the boy speaks.  
There you will find the answers you seek and the puzzle will be complete."

Before I could even tried to reply Edward pulled the car out of the driveway and drove away.

_Think back to the beach and the old stories the boy speaks. There you will find the answers you seek and the puzzle will be complete. _

What. The. Fuck.

Why did I have to fall for the one girl who holds the greatest mystery? Why? Is it because she's a girl? Well hell then I'll go become a nun!

_Think back to the beach and the old stories the boy speaks. There you will find the answers you seek and the puzzle will be complete._

Really why does it have to be a riddle? I mean for fucks sake I already have a headache! I do not need another one.

_Think back to the beach and the old stories the boy speaks. _

Beach beach beach?

What beach? There's only one beach I've been to….That's it! La push! And La Push means Jacob!

_Old stories he speaks. _

Story story story? What story? Story.. Story… story…

"_So what's the deal with the Cullens not being allowed to come here?"_

"_Oh there's this old family legend. I don't really believe it, but the tribe is all about it."_

"_Tell me it."_

"_Well it says the Tribe is supposed to be descendents of wolves. One day they were hunting for food when they came across a group of people feasting on some deer.  
These people were called the cold ones. The Tribe didn't want them around, so the leader made a deal with their coven. If they stayed off our land then they wouldn't be bothered."_

"_But that's like 100 years ago right? How does it relate to the Cullens?"_

"_Like I said Bells, it's just a story."_

The cold ones! That's it. But what are the cold ones? I sit on my bed and open my laptop. Hundreds of links appeared, but only one got my eye.

_The Cold Ones,_ I started, _are immortal beings. They are impossibly fast. Granite like skin. Cold to the touch. They don't eat. And they can sit still without having to move an inch.  
They can't sleep. They thrive off blood. _

_Blood of humans. _

_Their origin of creation is unknown. They are highly dangerous. And can only die by fire. Obsessive when they meet their mates and controlled by the lust that drives them insane. _

_They're monsters. A monster that feeds on the blood of humans. A monster that can't be contained._

_They are vampires._

**Vampire. Vampire. Vampire.**

I'm in love with a Vampire.

A fucking _vampire. _

_You'll regret this later Bella. She's a monster. Your going to regret this. Regret it._

And my dream and Alice's picture…

_It was a drawing of a meadow. The meadow was beautiful. It was surrounded by trees and covered in flowers. You could see the sky perfectly and along the grassy banks  
ran a river or a stream that was just gorgeous. __**"Wait up Alice! (laughs) Wait up!"**_

"_**Hurry up Bells. We don't got all day! We've got to hurry!"**_

"_**You run so fast! Where are we going anyways!"**_

"_**Just come on! Before the sun sets!"**_

"_**What's the sun go to do with anything!"**_

_**Huff huff "It's not the sun that's important…." She replies before disappearing ahead of me. I try catching up, but I run out of breath and stager against  
a tree. I call out for Alice again. No answer, just the wind.**_

"_**It's the night that's important." Alice says right behind me and I jump.**_

"_**Geez Alice you scared me shitless!" (laughs) "what about the night?"**_

_**Alice doesn't reply just stares at me with her golden eyes.**_

"_**Alice?"**_

_**Again she doesn't reply, just stares at me and smiles. I see fangs appear from her mouth. **_

_**She walks towards me just smiling an.. Evil smile.**_

"_**A-Alice? W-what are you doing?"**_

"_**I told you," She says with a smirk, "We didn't have all day."**_

"_**What are you talking about? What's going on? Your..your freaking me out."**_

_**She laughs a laugh I once thought was beautiful, but now it just sends shivers along my spine.**_

"_**Oh oh my dear sweet Bella. Do you think I really loved you? No no my sweet clueless Bella. I just used you to get what I wanted. To get what I craved."**_

"_**W-what is it that you want?"**_

"_**Your life." She says before lunging for my neck.**_

_A Dream._

**Picture.**

_**Vampire.**_

Fuck.

_For Halloween I was the Grim Reaper's wife ,yea yea yea  
__We are in love and we love our life, yah yah yah  
__He's just perfect and now I see, yea yea yea  
__That his perfect black rose is just for me, yah yah yah_

_Oh black rose black rose  
__Looking at me  
__You look so dead  
__Yet you smell so sweet_

_Yea yah yea yah_

_Oh black rose black rose  
__Looking at me  
__You look so dead  
__Yet you smell so sweet_

_I can't believe, how much he loves me, yea yea yea  
__It's like he knows we're meant to be, yah yah yah  
__But then at midnight the tables turn, yea yea yea  
__Now this is a lesson I must learn, yah yah yah_

_Oh black rose black rose  
__Looking at me  
__You look so dead  
__Yet you smell so sweet_

_Yea yah yea yah_

_Oh black rose black rose  
__Looking at me  
__You look so dead  
__Yet you smell so sweet_

_I look at the man that was once so sweet  
__Looking so dead, makes my heart skip a beat  
__He pulls out the black rose  
__I once though was my treat._

_Oh black rose black rose  
__Looking at me  
__You look so dead  
__Yet you smell so sweet_

_Yea yah yea yah_

_Slowly I feel my life slipping me by, yea yea yea  
__I don't think I'm meant to die, yah yah yah  
__I'm cold and I'm lonely, yea yea yea  
__With nothing left but my black rose  
__That now smells like death._

_Oh black rose black rose  
__Looking at me  
__You look so dead  
__Yet you smell so sweet_

_Yea yah yea yah_

_Last Halloween I was the Grim Reapers Wife  
__Now I've lost my soul  
__I'm just empty inside_

_Yea _

_Ya_

_Yea_

_Ya_

_Yea……_

* * *

A.N./ Okay so I know I promised a long chapter, but hey this was longer than the others! (I think) anyways this chapter is the start of everything, so don't get mad for the length.  
I'm going to be updating a lot faster now cause I know **exactly **where I'm going next. Thank you all for reading and please review.

Because I'm the Grim Reapers wife… yea yea yea. ;)

-Broken.


	11. Undone

A.N. Okay I am soooooo sorry! I didn't plan to take this long to update, but my brother had other ideas. He took off all my keys on my laptop and I only managed to put half of them back on.  
Trust me it's hard to type without the keys. I really hope I don't ruin it more…..

Disclaimer: I do not own twilight. I do, unfortunately, own a half broken keyboard.

I'd like to thank my Beta Reader, Eden Storm, like always cause she's so awesome. I'd also like to tell her to hurry up and kill Ruben and stop teasing us!  
(Ruben is her character from her story Mesmeric Stranger. If you haven't read that then I'd like you to take a newspaper and beat yourself over the head with it.)

Also BIG thanks to all my readers who reviewed. I am almost at 100 reviews and that's just amazing. Ever since I've joined FanFic I've always wanted to write a story  
and get 100 reviews on it. So when and if I reach that goal I will personally thank every single reviewer.

Now long authors note aside please Enjoy.

* * *

Undone

_Can you feel it?  
__The air I breathe across your neck  
__Can you hear it?  
__The growl within my chest  
__Can you smell it?  
__Those pheromones in the air  
__Can you touch it?  
__My heart that doesn't beat  
__Can you taste it?  
__A taste so sweet  
__Can you see it?  
__The mask I must wear_

_If I told you once  
__I've told you a thousands times  
__The person you love  
__Is nothing but a lie_

_People will ask  
__When your'e buried underground  
__If love really makes one so blind  
__How come we fight for it  
__With our lives?_

_You should have listened  
__To the warnings he spoke_

_You should have ran away  
__Before the clock stroke_

_Your world is coming down  
__Crashing all around you  
__The lies are coming undone  
__Ripping you of your virtue_

_So when you scream in fear of your love  
__Just remember it's your fault your hearts become  
__Undone_

Alice Cullen is a vampire.

_A fricken VAMPIRE!_

The thing that's not suppose to exist….

The **thing** that everyone dresses up as for Halloween….

The thing that I just learned is… _real. _

Fuck me.

I mean seriously! The one girl I happen to fall in love with maybe wants to suck my blood. Dear God, why couldn't I be straight? Or fall for someone else?  
Am I just a walking stick full of bad luck? Do I have the words _**yes go ahead and screw me**_ tattooed across my forehead?

A vampire….

Fuck.

Fuck

Fuccccccccccccccccccccckkkk!

_Okay so Alice Cullen is a vampire, so what?_

So what! So what! For all I know she wants to suck my fricken blood!

_Did she do anything to make you think that? Hmmm? When she was kissing you did you think she just tricking you? Hmmm? HMMMM?_

Well…. No, but still…. I mean she's a vampire…

_Well what do you know about vampires?_

Well let me see…

They sleep in coffins, drink blood, sleep during the day, drink blood, hate garlic, oh and did I mention they drink BLOOD?

_Did you see the look on Alice's face when you left? Or are you really that selfish?_

You know what! I'm ignoring you now.

_Fine be an idiot for all I care. _

UGH! Stupid inner voice. I hate it. I mean really who does it think it is? Trying to tell me I'm the idiot. I'm not going to date a vampire, no way. That's got to be the stupidest  
thing I could ever do. She's a blood sucking monster!

Okay whoa… is that what I think Alice really is now? A monster?

Seriously….. Just fuck me.

Just fuck me sideways!

**I can make your bed rock. I can make your bed rock. Just call me Mr. Flintstone cause I can make your bed ro-**

"Hello?" I ask as I answer my phone

"Bella? Yea it's Jacob. I was wondering if you are busy."

Yes! Jacob will be a great distraction from.. Well you know.

"No I'm not. What's up?"

"I just wanted to see if you want to hang out. I uh want to apologize for my behavior last week."

He wanted to apologize….and so he should…but still…the distraction…

"It's cool Jake, I'd love to hang out."

I could almost see Jake's smile as he bellowed

"Awesome! So come to my house in about an hour?"

An hour….I really needed that distraction sooner….

"How bout thirty minutes?" I asked hopefully.

"Perfect! See you soon Bells." With that the phone call ended. Hopefully this will be good. Maybe, just maybe I could talk to Jake about this. I have a strong feeling he  
knows more then he lets on.

I ran upstairs, tripping on the second step, grabbing the railing before I could fall. Threw on some red skinny jeans with a black t-shirt. Slipped on my sneakers, grabbed  
my keys, and then dashed down the stairs and out the front door. It usually takes 20-25 minutes to get to Jake's house, but I don't trust my truck.

For once the wheatear is semi nice so I don't need a jacket. I turn on the engine and the radio to kill the silence.

**Welcome to night time Seattle news brought to you by King Rock station. Another group of hikers were found dead today, bearing the same marks as the other 6.  
We have Officer Carlos here to shed some light on what's happening. **

**Officer Carlos, what or who do you think is causing these attacks?**

_**Well Chuck, we think it's a very large bear or even possibly a wolf pack.**_

**But there are no wolves in the Seattle area, isn't that correct?**

_**Yes that is correct, however animals tend to move from place to place.**_

**Is there any chance this isn't an animals doing?**

_**Unfortunately there's a high chance that these attacks were indeed made by a human. **_

**Wouldn't that make Seattle in danger of a possible serial killer?**

_**I don't want to scare anyone, but all police officers are advising that people stay indoors and to not go out at night or even anywhere near the woods.  
Especially down there in that small town of Forks. **_

**Well that's all the time we have, thanks for coming on the show and talking to us officer Carlos.**

_**It was my pleasure Chuck, just trying to keep my people safe.**_

**Well done. We'll be back with some tunes so please stay tuned through this commercial break.**

_Are you tired of your gum…..-_

**Click.**

Six dead bodies found in the woods near Forks? So that's why Charlie has been out so late. I hope he's safe.

25 minutes pasted more quickly then I anticipated and I could see Jake's house up ahead. He was outside working on what looked like a dirt bike. I pulled the car to  
a stop and cut the engine. Instantly he was opening my diver side door, wearing a big smile on his face.

"Hey Bells! Long time no see.'

"Hey Jake. How you been? I see you got a new bike."

"I've been good. Oh that's not new. I'm just fixing it up. You like?"

"You fix bikes? Nice. Yea I like. Can I ride it when you're done?"

"I don't think so Bells.. I mean you can barley walk on your own two feet!" Jacob let out a huge laugh.

"Shut up you punk." I laughed, punching Jake in the arm.

"Ow Bells. I need this arm you know?"

"You know that didn't hurt. Jerk."

He grinned, " Ha yea, but sure you can ride it if you know how?"

"Well you can teach me. Just think of it as I forgive you kind of thing."

His grin faltered, "Oh yea, look Bells about that. Look I lied, I didn't invite you out here to hang. I invited you out here to talk."

Huh? "What?"

"It's about Alice and the Cullen's."

My mood immediately changed. "You mean to tell me you tricked me!"

"I'm sorry Bells, I didn't know if you would come out if I told you the real reason."

"Fine whatever. Tell me what you need to tell me so I can leave."

"I don't want you to lea-"

"Just tell me Jacob!" I hissed

"Alright," he started with a sigh, " I can't let you hang out with them anymore. It's not safe. No, it's down right dangerous."

I felt the anger bubble. "I told you before or do you not remember? I can hang out with whoever I want!"

"This isn't a request Bella. It's an order."

A WHAT! "AN ORDER! YOU CAN'T ORDER ME AROUND BLACK! JUST WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE!" I screamed.

"Bella calm down, please. I'm doing this for you own good. The Cullen'ss aren't who you think they are. They are all monsters. Especially that Alice chick-"

**SMACK**

"Don't you ever call Alice a monster! I told you to never to call her a monster again! You just never learn Jacob." Ow fuck now my hand stings….

Jacob rubbed his cheek with his left hand before taking a step towards me. I in turn took a step back.

"Bella, please. I'm doing this as your friend." He almost whined.

"You're not my friend anymore Jake." I replied, turning around and walking back to my truck. Slamming the door as I hopped in. I start the engine and back up the truck.  
Before I pull out of Jacob's driveway I roll down my window and call at Jacob.

"I know what the Cullen's are Jacob. I _know _who they are. And I'm not afraid of them. They are not _monsters. _They are my friends."

With that I pulled out of the driveway and drove off, the last thing I saw was Jacob's face in my mirror, eyes wide with realization that the dust hid with it's powerful haze.

* * *

What am I doing here? She probably doesn't even want to talk to me. She probably hates me.

What. Am. I . doing. Here.?

"Bella….." Oh yes, that's what I'm doing here.

"Umm h-hey Alice. Can we- uh are you- I mean can we talk? Please?"

She stood in the doorway, eyes wide with surprise and sadness.

_Sadness you caused._

I am still ignoring you.

_Meh, I was right anyways._

Ugh.

A couple of minutes pass by and she's still standing there.

Like that.

Staring.

At me.

"Um," I clear my throat "Alice?"

She blinks then shakes her head. Clearing her uh surprise I'm assuming.

"So can we talk?" I gently asked again.

"Yes! I uh mean yes uh come on in."

I take a step forward, but then remember what happen last time I went in this house.

"Um c-can we like talk outside instead? If that's okay." I mumbled, shifting my foot in the dirt creating a small dust cloud.

"Yea, yea that's fine. Let's um go sit on the bench over there."

I nod and follow Alice to the bench. As we're walking I get a good look at her. She looks horrible, like a person who hasn't slept in days. Uh that is if vampires can even sleep.  
We sit down as far apart as possible (which really just breaks my heart).

Silence fills us for a couple minutes. It's not the right kind of silence either. It's the awkward uncomfortable kind. The kind that makes you want run far away from it.

But I'm done running.

"Alice"

"Bella."

We speak at the same time and I can see Alice try to hide a smile while I hold in a laugh.

I nod for her to go first. She takes a deep breath and begins.

" Bella, look I'm so sorry for the other day. I can totally understand if you want to end us- or this-"

"No." She looks up surprised at my interruption. " I don't want to end this.. Um relationship."

"Really?" she whispers in a small voice, which just makes me realize how much of an idiot I really am.

_Told you. _

Grrrrr

"Really. I uh I mean Edward he's kind of like the Riddler you know?" I continued.

"Who?" she questioned, raising a perfect eyebrow.

"Oh it's this bad guy from Batman."

"Who's Batman?"

"He's a superhero. You know guy in a cape and mask."

"Ummmm."

Is she serious? Batman is like a God… " Well never mind. I'll tell you about him later. The point is Edward gave me a head start you could say and well…"

"Well what?" she asked, a look of worry on her face.

"I um kindofknowwhatyouare." Since when did I learn to speak like a weirdo?

"Come again?"

"I know who you are. That you're a vampire."

Silence once again settles upon us. It's different this time, because I know Alice is thinking. See she gets this cute look on her face and yea…

"So you know." she repeated.

"Yea."

"And you're okay with it?" she asked, her voice hesitant.

"Yes." I reply, firmly.

"Really?"

"Yes." I answer moving my body closer to her and placing my hand on top of hers. I hesitate, before intertwining our fingers together.

"I really am. I just want you to tell me about it. The information I looked up didn't say much."

Alice sighs happily before leaning her head on my shoulder.

"Well we don't sleep."

"Ever?" I questioned, slightly amazed at her statement.

"Ever. We can daydream. Close our eyes and float we like to call it."

"Float?"

Alice smled. "Yes. It's like we're aware of everything around us, but we don't acknowledge it."

"Oh. What else?" I continued to ask.

Alice smiled again. "We have super strength and super speed."

"Like you can pick up a car with your hand?"

"Try with our pinkies."

"Wow…." Now I was impressed.

"Yea. And we have to stay away from direct sunlight."

"Why, do you sparkle?"

"No," Alice says with a laugh. "We don't have shadows. So people would think it was weird if they saw a person with no shadow. For some reason it doesn't work with  
electricity. So we just have to worry about the actual sunlight."

"Oh okay that makes sense. I mean really can you imagine? I vampire that sparkles?"

We break out in laughter which continues for a couple minutes before Alice speaks again.

" We um don't eat." She continued, hesitantly

"So how do you uh live?" I had to ask, I had to know…

"We drink."

Oh boy.. "Drink what?"

"Blood."

Hello Mr. Silence. Once again you grace us with your presence.

"u-uh o-okay. B-blood yea I s-see."

"You can leave now, if you want." Alice mumbles staring to pull her hand away. I pull it back against mine before she can separate our fingers.

"No. I trust you. I do." And I did. Completely.

"Thank you Bella." She said with a breathtaking smile on her face.

"Your welcome."

This time the silence is welcomed. It's a blissful silence. One that can only be rare.

" We drink animal blood."

I felt my mouth open slightly. "What?"

" My family and I we drink animal blood. It's kind of like being a vegetarian. Carlisle decided he wanted to find a way that vampire could live _normal _I guess you could say,  
among the humans. That's why we go to school and call ourselves a family."

"So vampires usually aren't like you guys?"

"No vampires usually travel by themselves or with one other vampire. Our family is very rare among our kind."

I really was fascinated now. "So do you guys have any powers? Can vampires have powers?"

"Yes," Alice giggled " Jasper, Edward, and I have powers."

" What are they?"

Alice paused, before continuing. "Well Jasper can feel a person's emotions and change them. If you're sad he becomes sad, so he usually has the hardest time  
around humans."

" Oh yea hormones are a killer. What about Edward?"

"Edward can read minds-"

"What!" No….Way…

"Calm down Bella, he can't read your mind. For some strange reason."

"Oh uh good. Sorry continue."

"Yes well he can read someone's conscious thoughts, but not their unconscious thoughts. He can never turn it off though, so he's constantly learning how to  
find a way to block the thoughts."

"Ah okay. And you?"

_What could you do Alice…._

"I can see the future." She answered, tilting her head to one side.

"No fricken way!"

"Yes fricken way. It's not set in stone though."

"What do you mean?"

"It's hard to explain, but I'll try. Let's take the lottery for one example, I can't see the outcome of the numbers, because the balls come at random. I can see when  
a person is going to buy a ticket and what ticket they buy, but the outcome of the numbers don't come to me. But let's say you were deciding whether to wear red  
or white. You chose red. I would know instantly because you chose it. My visions are only based on peoples choices. So they constantly change."

"That must give you a headache sometimes." I asked, raising my eyebrows now.

"Yes, but it's worth it."

It was getting dark now, but I didn't want to leave just yet. I was absorbing all Alice told my like a sponge and I didn't want to forget anything.

"Wait a minutes."

Alice frowned slightly. "What is it Bella?"

"If you can see the future, then how come you didn't see me choose to come here."

" I wasn't looking." She replied, matter of factly.

"Excuse me?"

Alice squeezed my hang. "Okay you remember how I said Edward can't turn his gift off right?"

"Yea."

"Well he can't really ignore it either. The person's mind has to block him. It's a complex equation I'm not going to go into right now. The point is that while Edward  
can't ignore his Jasper and I can."

I still felt a little confused. "I'm not following you."

"Okay Jasper can feel and give off emotions. But he _doesn't _have too. Let's say your feeling happy right? He doesn't have to change your emotion if he doesn't want to.  
This is why he usually stays away from the gloomy people."

"Okay I get Jasper's gift, but you said _you _weren't looking. What does that mean?"

Alice smiled again as my heart gave a small flutter. "While my visions are by choice, I have the ability to not look at one. See I can feel a vision before I see it, so I can  
chose to not see it. I rarely do this because my visions are always important to me. But with you. I just felt like I was invading your privacy so I didn't look."

I smiled now. "Thanks Alice. That's really considerate of you."

She shrugged as I leant over to kiss her cheek.

The wind started to pick up a little making me shiver. Between Alice's cold skin and the weather I knew it was time to go.

"It's getting late." Alice sighed.

"Yea, I should get going." Even though I really didn't want to…

"Alright I'll walk you to your car."

"Wait," I replied, stopping Alice from getting off the bench "One more thing. What happened the other day? I mean I get Rosalie doesn't like, but you…."

Alice dropped her head, before glancing back at me. "Vampires are very possessive and territorial. You see since we've decided to live off animals, we are actually fighting  
the vampire within us. So when we find a mate that _instinct _gets released and focused on protecting our mates. We tend to lose control if the vampire part of us feels that  
our mate is threatened."

"Oh."

_Oh? Really that's all you could say? Are you serious?_

Look it's a lot of information to swallow. So just shut the hell up okay?

"Bella?"

"Huh?"

"You coming?" Alice asked, as I blinked.

"Oh yea sorry."

We got up off the bench and reached my car in a matter of seconds. I didn't want to leave, but I really needed to think about everything that's happened. I got into the  
car and started the engine. Alice started to walk away, but before she got far I reached my arm of the window and stopped her. She turned around and raised her eyebrow in question.

And my answer?

Well let's just say that her lips are as amazing as I remember.

The kiss ended too soon as we pulled away slowly.

"I'll call you."

"When?" Alice questioned.

I grinned, "In the future." I say with a wink, as I pulled out of the driveway and began my way back home.

Alright so there are three things I'm absolutely sure of…

One: Alice Cullen (Along with her family) is a vegetarian vampire.

Two: I am falling in love with her so fast, it makes my head spin

And Three: She already loves me. At least I think…

I could practically feel my cheeks burn from the smile stretched along my face. Alice Cullen loves me and I'm falling in love with her.

While there were three things I was absolutely sure of, there was one I was blinded from seeing

The vampire in Alice wasn't looking to protect.

It was looking to _feast. _

_So grab your popcorn  
__Candy and more  
__The shows about to start  
__Let's wait no more_

_The big bad wolf  
__Is in town  
__Old grandma is dead  
__The old hag drowned_

_He's wearing a mask  
__That's thick not thin  
__Your walking on glass  
__I hope you can swim_

_Shh shh!  
__The lights have gone down  
__Look look!  
__There she is now  
_

_Look at her  
__So stupid and young  
__It makes me sick  
__To watch this scum_

_She's playing with fire  
__And she's gonna get burned  
__She's blinded by shadows  
__That never see the sun_

_Don't cry  
__Don't beg  
__For this tragedy  
__You're the one to blame._

_So shut your trap  
__And bring on the pain  
__Let the poison spread  
__And melt your brain._

_And remember, what I said  
__As you scream in fear of your love  
__It's your own fault  
__Your heart's become_

_**Undone.**_

* * *

A.N./ Again I'm really sorry for taking so long to update. I'm out of school now (YAY) so I'll be updating more and more.

OH and with the whole sparkling thing. I hope no one gets mad about that.

And I used the Riddler and Batman cause they rock! :D

Please Review

-Broken


	12. Prey

A.N. I hope I posted fast enough for everyone. I seriously am thankful for all the reviews. I am writing everyone's name down who reviewed and at the end  
of the story I will post a chapter with all those names in it. So seriously thank you all.

Disclaimer: I don't own twilight. Yea that's it.

Warning: This chapter is seriously depressing. I'm dead serious. I tend to write how I feel. So be aware as you read it, you may get depressed. For that I am not  
sorry, since I did warn you.

Enjoy.

* * *

Prey

_These tears, they don't compare  
__To the pain you must feel._

_These scars, seem like nothing  
__To stain on your heart._

_This rage, can't comprehend  
__The silence you hear._

_These word, can't speak  
__For the feelings you bare._

_This world, means nothing  
__If your not there._

_So I'll take this dagger  
__And slit my throat_

_Because being a burden  
__Is all she wrote._

Do you know what it's like….

To be locked away?

Covered in filth?

Drowned in tears?

Full of anger and hate?

Do you know what it's like…

To scream silence?

To feel only pain?

It's like a sword piercing your heart. Out then in again. Out then in again. Twist it. Turn it.

The blood seeps out, but you can't cry. It pulls around you, soaking your bones, but you can't move.

You **can't **fucking do anything….

Do you know what it's like…

To never feel love? To see it all around you, mocking you, choking you with its soft hands that smell so sweet. You can't touch it. You can't even smile at it, because  
it burns your cheeks and waters your eyes.

I fucking **hate **it.

How it makes me sick to watch people **love. **Even saying the fucking word brings a disgusting taste to my mouth. I'd rather drink gasoline then light a match  
afterwards then say that fucking **word.**

A **lit** match.

It fucks with your mind! Pounds you into this mumbling, stuttering fool! Then it laughs behind your back. It lights a fire under your ass. It gives you the razor  
and watches you bleed.

It fucking watches you **die.**

Withering away up to heaven where another life awaits.

_Please, _don't make me gag. It's a joke. A sick twisted joke that everyone knows about but you. So while you're standing there smiling and floating on cloud nine, people  
are laughing their fucking asses off.

Fuck. That.

**Love. **Ugh! Please just hand me a gallon of gasoline now. Make it burn as it goes down my throat.

Make me fucking **bleed.**

Grab your fucking knife and stab me in the back. Better yet, stab me in the front so I can see the truth finally come alive in your eyes.

The truth fucking hurts. Hit by a train? Nothing compared to the truth. Try rolling in gasoline, then becoming a fucking fire tornado. Then maybe, **maybe **you'll feel an  
inch of the pain that the truth inflicts.

Fuck that. Not even a fucking inch. A fucking centimeter. You know how small that shit is? It's like one spec of dirt that you can barley see with a microscope. Magnify  
that by then, and then you'll reach the inch.

The truth is worse then hell. I'd rather jump down there and be tortured till I was on the verge of dying, then healed and tortured again. That's how fucked up the truth is.

The truth is that no one cares.

**No one.**

No one gives a shit if you got a new hair cut on Friday. Or if you got a new puppy or if your dad died. NO one fucking cares! It's bullshit how people think otherwise.  
No it's fucking pathetic.

You want attention? Fine, go jump off a bridge. Or use a rope. Or slit your wrist. That's the only way people will see you. They won't care, fuck that I told you that  
already. No one cares, they'll just pretend like every other fucking person in the world. They are all sick and twisted.

Fucked up people.

Fucked up world.

Fucked up society.

Just one big fuck up.

You don't want to believe me? Fine, be blind and ignorant for the rest of your life. See if I give a shit. I don't care about anyone, but myself.

And most of the time I don't give a shit about myself. Oh if only I could slit my wrist. Not to die you fucking idiots, to **feel. **Have you ever noticed that the people  
who slit their wrist don't do it for attention half the time? Of course you didn't notice, you fucking idiot. All this time people make fun of 'emos' or whatever you  
people call them because you all think they want attention.

You guys are on stupid race.

Seriously fucked up and stupid. Can it get any worse? They do it to _**feel**_. Some humans are so fucked up they can't even feel.

Can you imagine that? Going day by day forcing that smile on your face? Or those tears? That laugh? That blade, as it digs in the skin, gives them back what  
they don't have. What they've never had. It's a fucking addiction that they can't break. No matter how long they go without it, they go at it again. Their skin  
inches when they don't do it. It just screams for that cold hard metal blade that's like God. To feel it and watch the blood pull and drip down their arm.

I so fucking wish I could do that.

But no…. I fucking can't. See what I have to go through? Do you fucking understand how I feel! Of course you fucking don't!

No one can understand my pain.

A pain so deep within my core no ounce of healing would kill it. A pain that stabs and stabs constantly. I just wish it would go away. Just go the fuck away!

I fucking hate you humans. You filthy disgusting no good race! With your fucking TVs and your fucking houses and your fucking families. Just fuck all of you!

How I would love to make you all bleed. To rip those fake smiles from your faces and smash your heads into the pavement. How I wish I could all just make you **scream. **

But I can't. I'm fucking locked up in here, like some fucking caged animal! God Dammit I have fucking FEELLINGS! Doesn't anyone understand that! I'm not dead.  
I'm not a fucking mindless zombie.

**I fucking hate you all.**

How I love it when you all are in pain. Even if it's not caused by me. How I love to see you cry and beg it to stop. You are all **worthless **creatures. You don't deserve  
to live. Fuck, you don't even deserve to die peacefully. No you should all die in pain. The pain I feel. The pain that pumps through my body like blood.

But it's not blood. How I wish it were.

This pain that pumps through my veins gives me life, yes, but a life I don't want to live. Everyday is a constant battle. Who will win today, me or the pain?  
The pain or I? Sometimes I like losing, just because I don't have to fight anymore. Because really how is it even possible to fight pain? The thing you can't touch. Can't see…..

Can only _**feel….. **_

It always comes back to that, doesn't it? Feeling. I can touch, but I can't feel. I can touch a tree and know it's texture. I can touch water and know its base.  
I just can't feel the water as it runs over my hand. I can't feel the cool sensation people say it gives. I can't feel the toughness the tree brings. Or the gentleness of a flower.

Ugh. Fuck, are you listening to me? I'm getting all sentimental and shit. Fuck that I'm one depressed bitch. I mean if it's even possible… I can't get depressed…..  
Don't you have to _**feel**_ to be depressed.

I really hate that word now. Seriously, where the fuck is my gasoline?

Just let me burn, for God sake's have a heart and just let me burn.

Let me **die.**

I'm just so tired of this life. _**Trying to fit in. Lying for love. Fighting to live.**_ Is it even worth it anymore? What do I have that's worth this pain pumping in my veins?

Is it her? Is she worth this?

_**Maybe…**_

**No. **Fuck that. No one is worth it. She's probably just pretending just like everyone else in this 'family'. Fuck this family. Fuck this life. Fuck love. Fuck the truth. Fuck feeling.

Fuck her.

People are going to ask why I did it. And I'm going to tell them.

_**It's because of love. **_The word that makes me want to drink gasoline and light a match; feeling the fire as it burns my throat.

_**It's because of the truth. **_How much it hurts as it stabs you repeatedly even if you only heard it once. Because once is enough.

_**It's because of feelings**_. How any creature doesn't see that I have them. I'm not some wild animal that should be locked away in a cage. I'm not some demon or monster.

_**It's because of the pain. **_The pain that pumps through my veins and gives me life. The pain I fight everyday to please everyone around me. To fit in with the rest of  
this fucked up world.

_**It's because I can. **_I can do anything I fucking want. I have no rules. No morals. I have no God. No holy mother of light. Fuck I don't even have a **heart.**

Alright so I do have one, but it doesn't beat so I don't count it as real. It's fake, just like the rest of this fucked up world.

_**It's because I'm so tired of being in the dark. **_My existence scolded for being alive. So fuck them all.

Fuck that stupid boy and his smug looks. Oh I can read your mind….. I'm so hot. Ha! Let's see you really read my mind fucker. You don't know half the shit I really think.  
I'm not even aware of it myself. So fuck you with your 'I have a God complex' attitude. I could break you so fast you wouldn't know what hit you.

Fuck that stupid blonde bitch. I'd like to smack her. With your air of 'I'm fucking better than all you' swirling around you like a tornado, making me want to puke.  
Oh If only I could. Oh boo hoo your human life ended in such a tragedy and you wished you could have just died instead. Oh Mrs. Bitch I will grant you that wish soon.  
Don't worry about the other two, you won't be needing them.

Fuck that oversized child. Bouncing all over the place like he's got no brain. Fuck did that stop working too when you were changed? Fuck you idiot. You make real idiots

look like fucking Einstein or something. Think you're so big and strong. Ha, really don't make me laugh. I'm not in the mood.

Fuck that emotional bastard. Oh boo who you have to feel everyone's emotions all the damn time. Asshole, at least you can feel. Fucker not grateful for what you're given!  
I'll fucking make sure you wished you were thankful.

Fuck those two posers. You're not fucking real parents and you never will be. So stop acting already. The curtains are down so take off the fucking masks. I'm sick of the lies.  
The smiles. Fuck that 'doctor' dad. HA you know every fucking day you're just torturing yourself with the sweet smell of blood. Psycho. And you Mrs. Mom. Lady reality check,  
you will never be a mother. **Never.**

Fuck this fake fucking family. I'm tired of this play. It's old and pathetic. The scenes never change, the lines remain the same and they always will.

Fuck that human girl. Claiming you love me. You don't even know what love is you child. You will never know what real love is. Not even if it's breathing down your throat.  
You're fake, just like all the other fucked up fake people.

Fake people. Fake society. Fake world.

I'm tired of this fucking cage I've been put in. I'm tired of watching from the sidelines. I'm so fucking tired.

So I'm going to do something about it. And it's going to be fun. I'm going to laugh and I'm going to smile.

I'm going to burn this city. I'm going to burn this world.

The shit is about to hit the fan and I'm the only one with an umbrella.

_**Do you know what it's like..**_**. **To finally be free from the cage you were dying in? To finally breathe air?

_**Do you know what it's like**__**… **_To watch yourself bleed? Not being able to stop the beauty of the blood, as it coats your arm in red.

_**Do you know what it's like… **_To pull the trigger that ended a life? To watch as their body hit's the floor and do nothing, but smile.

**I do and it all feels so damn good.**

Fucking **fantastic. **

I will use this pain that pumps in my veins to end her life.

I will use the truth to destroy her heart.

I will kill any feelings she has.

I will make her wish, she didn't believe in something so fake as love.

She will wish she was in hell.

She will wish she was dead.

She will pray for God.

He will never come.

She will scream for me to stop.

I will laugh and tell the bitch to shut up.

She will cry her every last tear.

I will smile, a twisted smile she will fear.

She will breathe her very last breath asking question with answers never to come.

I will be free, from my cage I have sprung.

_Come now little birdie  
__Don't be afraid  
__I am just a cat  
__I promise to behave._

_Come now little birdie  
__Sing me a song  
__I am just a cat  
__Passing along_

_Come now little birdie  
__Play me a tune  
__I am just a cat  
__In search for food_

_Come now little birdie  
__Show me some love  
__I am just a cat  
__Lonely as the sun_

_Come now little birdie  
__Open your cage  
__I am just a cat  
__And you are my prey_

_Poor little birdie  
__So stupid and naïve  
__Fooled by the cat  
__That caught you with ease_

_So you see  
__The moral of the story  
__In a world full of lies  
__There is no glory_

_As you sit there  
__In your world of lies  
__The blade only goes so deep  
__Until you die. _

_So be careful  
__When you slit your wrist  
__Don't look for attention  
__Look for reasons to exsist. _

* * *

A.N. I hope you guys liked it. If it was too depressing well then I did my job. This is no easy rollercoaster folks. So I will warn you from now on it will get ugly. If anyone knows

'who's' POV this was then go ahead and guess, but I'm not telling. I'm assuming it's easy to tell, but that's cause I wrote it.

Anyways please review. Next chapter may be not so depressing.

-Broken.


	13. Twiddle Dee, Twiddle Dumb

A.N. I'm terribly sorry it took me so long to get this out. I hit a bit of a brick wall, but thankfully I've over come it now. I am truly glad everyone  
liked the last chapter. Since I took so long to update there will be another chapter today, when I finish going over it. I hope everyone likes this chapter.

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. Duh.

As always I thank my Beta Reader, Eden Storm.

Enjoy

* * *

_Twiddle Dee ,Twiddle Dumb_

_Twiddle Dee  
__Twiddle dumb  
__Come on now  
__The song's been sung_

_The bells are ringing  
__The birds are singing  
__What in the world  
__Could go wrong?_

_I have you  
__You have me  
__So take my hand  
__Let's make history_

_I said take my hand  
__(Hold it tight)  
__Take my hand  
__(It starts tonight….)_

_Yea baby here we go  
__Now and forever  
__We will grow_

_Like a tree planted in the ground  
__Our song, they'll sing  
__And not even the devil  
__Can bring us down_

This can _not _be happening.

What the hell did I do to anyone to deserve this?

I don't hit dogs or throw cats. No I'm a nice person.

This is just ridiculous.

I mean really, who in the world trips over a ladybug and twists their ankle?

A god damn **ladybug. **

One of the smallest insects that ever lived. I mean seriously! There was no rock. No stick. It was a tiny little bug.

Someone shoot me now before I die of embarrassment. Just shoot me now.

A ladybug!

LADYBUG…..

Ugh. I just hate hospitals. How they're so fake. So white. So…

**Full of death. **

I'm serious. It's like death is in the walls. Or carried in the air. You can feel it breathing down your neck, taunting you. Damn I just gave myself Goosebumps.

It's _that_ bad.

If you've never been to a hospital I'd advise you stay away from them. Unless your having a baby, because you wouldn't want to miss your hospital visit then...

Hmmm I wonder if vampires can have children….

Uhhh yea let's not go there…

Seriously though a ladybug?

The door opened, interrupting my thoughts on how to kill a ladybug. Carlisle, or should I say Dr. Carlisle Cullen, walked in holding a clipboard. How cliché.

"Hello Bella, how are you feeling?" he enquired.

"I'm fine Mr. Cullen-"

"Please call me Carlisle." He interrupted with a smile.

"Okay, Carlisle. I feel fine. Doesn't hurt too much, can I go home now?" I asked, hoping the answer was a yes.

"Well," He began, flipping through the papers on the clipboard "I would like you to test out your ankle before you leave. So I know if  
you need crutches." He answered with a smile.

_Crutches? _Who the hell needs crutches for tripping over a lady bug?

I shook my head, "I really don't need crutches. I can walk on it. See?" I got up putting normal pressure on my left foot, taking a step forward,  
I winched immediately.

"Ow! I uhh mean it feels fine…"

Carlisle raised an eyebrow and I sighed in defeat. Dammit I don't want crutches.

"Alright then I'll be back with a pair for you." Carlisle replies, turning around to go back out the door, before his hand even reached the knob the  
door flew open, barley missing his head.

A short, hyperactive pixie rushed over to me pulling me into her arms.

"Uh Alice…too….tight.." I almost spluttered.

" Oh Bella, I'm so sorry." She replies releasing me. Oh yes, air. "I just heard you were at the hospital and I got here as fast as I could." She continued  
in a rush tone.

I smiled, "I'm fine Alice, just a sprained ankle."

"Oh you clumsy human. How did you manage this?" she enquired with a raised eyebrow.

"Um.. Well I kind of tripped over a ladybug.." I mumbled, knowing that Alice would still hear me.

She was silent for a couple seconds before busting out into a gut wrenching laugh.

"Alice!," I huffed, "It's not funny! You jerk."

" Oh Bella," She answered in between laughing, " I'm sorry, but a ladybug? Really? Was it a giant ladybug?"

I growled pulling away from Alice, crossing my arms over my chest. This is so embarrassing.

Alice winked "Come on Bells I'm just messing with you. I'm glad you're okay." She replied, gathering me in her arms once again. If this didn't feel  
so good, I wouldn't let her off so easily.

"You know…" She whispered, as I felt myself lean into her.

"Hmm?" So comfy….

"Emmet's going to have a field day with this." She finished with another laugh.

"Ugh!" I threw my hands up in the air. Do I _ever_ get a break?

"I have your crutches Bella." Apparently I _can't._

"Shut up Alice!" I yelled as her laughter filled the room once again.

Seriously, a **ladybug?**

* * *

"Is this really necessary?" I asked, convinced it wasn't….

"Yes." Was Alice's simple reply.

"Come on Alice!," I said with a groan. "This is beyond not cool."

Alice pouted. "Carlisle said you shouldn't be walking on your leg and you don't want to use your crutches. So here we are, the obvious conclusion."

"But do you really have to carry me!" I exclaimed.

It's true, I was being carried by non other than Alice Cullen. Now don't get me wrong, being carried by Alice is not as horrible as I'm making it out to be.  
Except for one thing…

We're at school.

And she's carrying me to every class.

I absolutely despise ladybugs.

"Are you really going to carry me to all my classes?"

Alice almost smirked. "Yes."

Ugh! Vampires, how I despise them too.

"Alice, please this isn't necessary."

"Tough."

"Alice!"

"I'm not putting you down." she casually replied.

"Ugh! Fine I'll use the crutches!" I hissed, caving in to her earlier demand.

"I knew you'd see it my way." She answered with a grin. Turning around and she motioned at Edward. He disappeared before quickly returning  
with crutches in his hand.

_My crutches…._

" You saw this didn't you?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

"Maybe." Alice replied with a grin.

I huffed, dropping carefully out of Alice's arms, I yanked the crutches from Edward's grip.

"You guys all suck. I hate vampires." I muttered as they just smirked in return as the bell rang signaling time to go to class.

Alice and I walked to class together in a comfortable silence. While I was still getting used to the whole vampire thing, I was sure that I couldn't  
imagine life without Alice. Or any of the Cullen's for that matter.

Well one less Cullen wouldn't hurt….

I mean really what is Rosalie's deal? I get that she wants to be human and doesn't like that fact that she didn't have a choice in the matter, but that's all in the past.

Way in the past.

And yet she can't get over it? I didn't do anything to her and instantly she hates me. It's a good thing Emmet knows how to calm her down every  
time I'm around or all hell would break lose.

I really want to ask Alice to explain more about..her 'vampire' part as she puts it. Is it like there's someone (or something) inside her? Another voice  
she hears in her mind? It's really frek-

"Bella watch out!"

**Crash!**

Ow! Fuck!

"Oh Bella I'm so sorry. Are you hurt? Where does it hurt?" A frantic Mike asked, eyes checking my body for any damage (besides the obvious).

"Well my ankle hurts." I winced, okay it feels like hell.

"Here let me see." Mike asked, putting his hand on my ankle in a gentle manner. Before I could say anything an intense growling behind me erupts.  
I turned my head to look and I see Alice shaking with rage? Suddenly Alice's words ring in my ears.

"_Vampires are very possessive and territorial. You see since we've decided to live off animals, we are actually fighting the vampire within us.  
So when we find a mate that instinct gets released and focuses on protecting our mates. We tend to lose control if the vampire part of us feels that  
our mate is threatened."_

Oh shit. Not only do I have to deal with my throbbing ankle, but now I have to deal with an over possessive mate.

Dear Ladybug, how I hate thee.

"Alice," I start "Calm down love, please?"

She just continues growling, while glaring at Mike.

I sighed, turning back to Mike. "Mike I'm fine just help me up, please."

_Before you get your head ripped off…_

He extended his hand and pulled me to my feet.. well, foot.. I leaned against the lockers, while he picked up my crutches and handed them to me.  
I smiled my thanks and started to walk back to Alice, with the goal of calming her down, when Mike grabbed my elbow stopping me.

"Hey wait Bella. I'm really sorry about running into you, I'd like to make it up to you. How about I take you to the movies? Say Saturday night?" Before I could  
answer, Alice was in front of me, growling viciously.

"She has other plans." She spat out, making Mike stagger backwards in surprise and a little fear.

"U-uh o-okay l-l-later Be-Bella!" He said before running away. Alice's growling only stopped once he was out of sight.

"Really Alice! You didn't need to scare him!"

"You're my mate." Alice hissed, almost baring her white teeth.

"I know that Alice, but that doesn't give you the right to act like that." I answered honestly.

"You are **mine."** She said and suddenly I felt the coldness of the lockers against my back.

"A-Alice?"

She buried her head into my neck, breathing in deeply, then flicking her tongue across my neck.

"A-Alice!" I stammered again.

"You smell so good. So…. _**delicious.**_" She whispered into my neck.

_**Oh my god. She's..She's**_

**Licking **me. And it's the most strangest feeling in the world.

And I absolutely _love _it. I groan throwing my head back against the lockers, causing little stars to appear before my eyes.

"A-Ali, w-we have c-class…"

"**So good." **She huskily whispered as I felt my entire body sag.

Dear God, this vampire is going to be the death of me. A slow, pleasure filled death I'm going to enjoy.

But a death non the less.

No matter how badly I wanted to continue this, this just wasn't the time nor the place.

With what little strength I could muster, I pushed against Alice's chest, hoping she would back off.

I was wrong.

Instead she just pressed against me closer (if that was even possible!). Deeply inhaling my scent. I tried again, this time harder, like I meant it.

Not a good decision. Not at all.

"**Mine!" **Alice said with a growl so terrifying it sent shivers down my spine, and not the good kind.

"Yes yours, only yours now Alice please let go your hurting my back." I answered yet all I got in response was more growling and a cool sensation against my neck.

What the _hell_…

Holy

Fuck.

That cool sensation? Yea that's not her breath.

That's her **teeth. **

Who was I kidding really? I should have let Alice just carry me around, because for some reason I blame all this on those damn crutches.

Oh ladybug I will get my revenge.

Once again I pushed against Alice hoping she'd come to her senses soon, when I heard a voice I'd never thought I'd be glad to hear.

"Alice, really I thought you had more control then this. I didn't know my sister was so weak."

Like I said, I never thought I'd be glad to hear Rosalie's voice, no matter how bitchy that sentence just was.

It had the best results though, because instantly Alice was off me and crouching in front of Rose.

Will I _ever_ get a break?

"**Mine!" **Alice pronounced, before lunging at Rose.

Apparently not.

I swear vegetarian vampires are worse than teenage girls PMSing!

Now on top of my throbbing ankle, cold back, and new headache coming along, I had a angry possessive vampire.

Again.

"Alice! Please I'm yours! Just calm down love!" I frantically replied.

She just growled in return, before throwing another kick aimed at Rosalie's head.

Great! Just fucking great! Now I have a vampire fight to deal with, a fight that could expose them and all that shit I don't want to happen.

I'm beginning to hate high school even more now.

The two vampires continued to throw punch after kick and back again. Really though, where the hell is a hall monitor or something? There's no way no one  
could not hear what going on.

"Alice!" I hissed again.

Does she make it a goal to not listen to me? What the hell? Stupid airhead vampire! I'm not going to take this shit. But how can I get through to her?

Dammit I'm not just going to stand here! Screw my ankle! I got up, painfully I might add, and ran over to Alice (Okay so I more like hopped..) and Rosalie.  
I was going to embrace Alice in hope that it would calm her down. But before I could reach her, strong arms grabbed me from behind and pulled me back.

"Bella stop struggling."

"No! Dammit Edward let me go! I have to calm Alice down!"

I felt Edward's breath on the side of my face. "There's nothing you can do, Bella. She's out of control right now."

"But Rosalie!"

"Rose will be fine, come on we have to go."

"No, I'm not leaving Alice!" I retorted, as Edward frowned.

"Dammit Bella, this is serious! That's not Alice anymore! I know she told you about the side effect of feeding on animals. This is it! She's not herself right now!  
You can't help her!"

"I can and I will!" I hissed indignantly.

"I'm sorry Bella, but I won't let you go." Edward tightened his grip and started to pull me towards the doors outside the school, away from Alice. I could  
see her and Rosalie fading in the distance, when Rosalie suddenly surprised Alice and caught her with a kick in the head.

And then I did the worst possible thing I could have done.

I screamed.

The next few moments felt like a dream. I was flying through the forest, jumping from tree to tree, the wind blowing in my face. It took me a couple  
seconds to realize I was in Edwards arms and we were running.

I could faintly hear the growling of an angry vampire following us and as I looked up I was met with Edward's eyes. They looked pained, filled with  
sadness and regret. I knew then, that not even Edward, the fasted vampire known could outrun a monster. And before I knew it, what felt like a  
train, slammed right into us, sending me flying out of Edward's arms.

The last thought that crossed my mind before darkness took over, was that I never got the chance to tell Alice that I love her.

My silly vampire.

_Twiddle Dee  
__Twiddle dumb  
__It seems I was wrong  
__The devil has won_

_Nothing in the world could go wrong  
__How naïve I was to believe such a lie  
__You've let the monster free  
__And now I must die_

_I've been fooled  
__By a façade I know see  
__I was just a tool  
__Now plague with this disease_

_How could I believe  
__That true love would come for me?  
_

_Why did I not see  
__The words he spoke, were true?_

_Now I will wither away  
__Screaming in darkness  
__Pleading for you_

_I see now  
__The truth behind your lies  
__I know now  
__That all fairytales must die_

_There is no God  
__There is no happily ever after  
__There is no you  
__There is no me_

_The only thing that's real  
__Is the blood dripping from your lips_

_Twiddle Dee  
__Twiddle dumb  
__Come on now  
__Your job is done_

_Let's bury the hatchet  
__Throw away the gun  
__In this dance  
__The monster has won._

* * *

Please review :]


	14. Butterfly

A.N. Well here it is like I promised, a double update. Hope everyone likes it.

As always I thank my Beta, Eden. Girl you're the best mate ever.

Disclaimer: If I owned Twilight, you think I would need to find a job?

Enjoy

* * *

Butterfly

God

The almighty creator of our world.  
The man people worship as **If**

There's nothing better to do.  
He's a tyrant. A ruler of many minds. **God **

A savior of man, woman, and child.  
Yet we can't see him or feel him. He **Is**

A king of nations. A legend.  
Yet this god, this legend, is as **Real **

As a ghost. Invisible to sinners and  
in the hearts of believers. so **Why**

Does he not come when we cry help?  
When our families are dying. When man **Did**

The unspeakable. When murder became  
honor. Honor became murder .When **My **

Country perished in the eternal flames of  
lies, death, and **Love**

Seized to exists. There is no God. No hope.  
No faith. There's just loss and pain in this  
world where sooner or later we all **Die.**

Darkness. Pure darkness. That's what I see, every second. Every time I blink, darkness. No light what so ever. Did I suddenly go blind? No, no that  
can't be it. You can feel it if your blind…right?

Maybe I'm dead. No, no I don't remember dying. I believe I would remember dying. Am I buried? Have I been buried alive? So many questions filled my  
head. Questions I don't have answers too. Where can I find these answers? Are they in my head? I wouldn't know, I can't see anything, let alone know  
what's in my head. Maybe (hopefully) I'm just dreaming. Yes this all a nightmare and if I pitch myself I'll wake up.

What? I can't move my arms. I can't move anything. Okay okay breath girl, breath. Well at least I can hear myself breathing. That means I'm alive. Okay  
one question down, millions to go. Like where am I? How did I get here? I don't remember. I don't remember anything. Who am I? What's my name? How old am I?  
For Gods sakes I need to think. But it hurts. It all hurts.

I'm numb all over. Why am I numb? Who took me? And more importantly why? Why me? Did I piss someone off so bad they decided to take me? No, no I'm a  
good kid….right? I must be. Bad things always happen to good people..OW! Fuck what was that? That hurt my head. Was it a memory? Maybe. Let's think.  
I saw a girl. Or was it a woman? I don't know. I don't know! I feel so empty.

Maybe I am dead.

No I have to stop thinking negative. I'll get out of here. Someone who knows me will help me. Someone has to know me right? Maybe I've never really existed.  
I'm just a figment of my imagination. But then I wouldn't be anything cause if I'm not real then my imagination doesn't exists.

By God I'm going crazy

I'm a psycho girl who's tied up in the dark and has no idea who she is. Priceless. Do I have a family? Yes I must have a family. Maybe a little brother. Or a sister.  
Maybe I have a dog. I like cats better. I'm a cat person. I think. Something's dripping down my arm. What is that? Water? No, no.

It's blood.

My blood. Maybe that's why everything hurts. Okay so I'm not dead and I'm bleeding. That's some improvement. My ears are ringing. You know  
they say when your ears ring someone's talking about you. Which means at least someone knows me. That's a good thing. Unless they hate my guts and  
want to kill me…. Man maybe I did piss someone off enough to take me.

You know what would be cool? If my dad was a cop or my mom. Either or. Then they'd have a whole swat team looking for me. Breaking down doors just to  
save my sorry ass. I mean I am the one who got taken.

I wish I could remember. Remember something. Like a birthday. Or a face. Have you ever forgotten your own face? It's like looking in a mirror and not seeing  
anything. Or not recognizing who your looking at. Imagine how that must feel and you'll get my drift.

Time seems frozen now. I can count seconds in my head.. 1...2...3...4.….but I never know when it's been a minute or an hour. I don't have anywhere to start.  
I don't want to be here anymore. The darkness, the blood, the silence it's messing with my head. I want to go home! Why can't I go home?

Step step

What's that! Footsteps? That means someone's here. Is that good or bad?

Step step step

I can't tell. You know when you look at someone and you can read them? Well let me tell you footsteps aren't like that. You can't tell if the person is going to  
kill you or save you. Please God be the second one.

Step step step step

There getting closer now. I can feel it. It's like an earthquake is shaking the ground and I'm right on top of it. I can feel myself trembling beneath the ropes.  
The ropes cut my skin with every shake. Don't panic. Breath. Breath.

Step step step step step

Oh god, I'm going to die aren't I? I'm going to die not knowing who I am. Why can't I remember her beautiful face? Or his handsome features? Playing in the backyard  
under the tree or swimming in the ocean.

Walking along the sand or singing a song till my throat was raw.

Step step step step step step

Have I ever been in love? As I sit here, listening to the footsteps of a person I don't know come closer I wonder about these things. Do I know what it's like to be  
in love? To have a storybook romance.

Do I know what I love you means? Or are they just a bunch of words to me? I wish I could remember. Remember if I've given my whole being to be with someone.  
To live for them and only them. Maybe that's why I'm here. In this darkness. Feeling numb with pain. And blood dripping down my arms. Maybe I did it for love.

But that's just wishful thinking. I'm no knight in shining armor. No, I've been burned by the dragon.

Step step step step step step step

The footsteps are almost here now. I know I must fight. Fight to remember. So let's start with the facts. Facts I know.

Number 1: I'm surrounded by darkness

step

Number 2: Whoever is coming decides my fate. Whether that's good or bad, I don't know…yet.

Step step

Number 3: The pain is my friend. I need to embrace the pain. Love the pain. Pain means I'm alive. And being alive is the most important fact of all.

The footsteps are all gone now, leaving my beating thundering heart in it's wake.

I need to get out of here. First I need to figure out how to free my arms.

Free my arms and I can free my eyes. I'm not blind. I know that. I just know. Okay okay deep breath. I can do this, if I twist my wrist right. Twist it…Twist it..

FUCK! Ow ow ow! Okay ok breath, girl, breath and pull!

Yes! It's free! Oh thank god it's free. It may be broken, but at least it's free. Now I can untie my feet. Then I can run.

Run as far away from here as I can. Then I can figure out the rest. Who I am. What I'm doing here.

Yes! Okay those are free, now it's time to see. Time to be free.

I see a room, a basement really. There's an old sink, with the faucet dripping. A washer and dryer in the corner, looks broken. One window, that's nailed shut.  
And a swinging light barley flickering alive hanging above. Wait.. What's that?

Stairs! Maybe there is a God.

Ow! Fuck! My ankle is broken too! What the hell did I do to deserve all this! I'm a good person!

Right?…

Okay no, shake those bad thoughts away. No way can I afford to break down now. Alright let's do a check: I got a broken wrist and a twisted ankle.  
(Not broken, thankfully) I'm in some sort of basement, with someone trying to get me. I don't know who I am or why I'm even here. I don't know anything…

Yet. I will remember. I will, let's just focus on getting out of here first. The stairs, I need to get to the stairs.

I do, painfully.

Is that all I'll ever feel? Pain? The pain of not knowing. The pain of wondering. Wishing. Hoping. Praying..

Okay stop! I can do all that later. Later after I get out of here. Alright thankfully the door isn't locked. Let's just hope there's no one behind it.

No, just a hallway. Or should I say many hallways. With the walls lined in nothing but white paint. The whole place is white. No picture no color.

Where am I? Just where the hell am I!

Wait shh. Those footsteps again. Shit! I need to go, but which hallway do I take? The footsteps are getting closer now. I need to decide.

Before it's too late.

They all look the same! Maybe they all share the same fate. The fate I don't want to share.

The footsteps are getting closer. I need to run. I need to flee.

Why can't I just be free?

**Run. Run. Run as fast as you can.**

"_**One two I'm coming for you."**_

**Breath. Breath. Breath. Don't stop breathing.**

"_**Three four watch your body hit the floor."**_

**Scream. Scream. Scream till your lungs are raw.**

"_**Five six let's play some tricks."**_

**Pray. Pray. Pray for a God that will never come. **

"_**Seven eight just accept your fate."**_

**Pound. Pound. Pound on every passing door.**

"_**Nine ten I win again."**_

**Cry. Cry. Cry for a lover that's left you for **_**dead.**_

Where is everyone! Why can't they hear me scream? There's a voice now, following me. Just like the footsteps. Mocking, taunting, will I ever win?

This just isn't fair! What did I do to deserve this? Why am I running from a voice and it's footsteps? Why do I not know who I am? What I've done in life.

Am I even alive? Or am I dead? Or worse? Maybe I'm trapped in never ending darkness, never to remember anything ever again.

No, I won't think like that. Whoever you are I won't let you win! You hear me! I won't let you win.

"_Slow down Bella! Daddy can't run like he used to!"_

"_Come on slow poke! Mommy's not going to wait forever!"_

Bella. Bella. My name is Bella? But where did that come from? Was it like a memory?

I have memories?

_A small little girl is smiling up at a aging handsome man with a camera. He's laughing at the girl, making funny faces while pointing at the camera. _

_The girl is grown up now, along with the man. There's also a woman now. They all look sad. The man's eyes are filled with longing and regret.  
The woman's with sadness. While the little girl eye's are filled with tears, that slide along her face. Gone was the smiling little girl from before. _

"_You'll see him again Bella. Don't worry about your father. Charlie can take care of himself."_

_The girl just shook her head and got into a car after the woman, staring out the window, looking back at the man as the car drove away into  
the distance and away from sight. _

That little girl, she was me. My name is Bella. And I have a father. Charlie. But who was the woman? Was she my mother?

I can't stop and try to figure it out now. The footsteps, they're back. How did they find me so quickly? Will I ever get a break? It's like a fucking maze here!  
There's so many doors. So little time.

Can I travel in time, back to a place where I once knew?

Let me go I just want to wake up.

Can't someone get me out of here?

Can someone tell me where's my home.

Where can I find that man in the memory?

Can I be that little girl again? Smiling and so carefree? Why did this happen to me? Can I get some answers? Is this my destiny?

So many questions, so little answers. No time.

Something's chasing me here, In this place. I'm just running around, in circles.

Circles through the never ending dark. Where's the light?

Where's the exit because it's never in my sights. I don't even know where I am.

Why doesn't anyone save me! I can't be dead. The pain I feel tells me I'm alive.

Very much alive.

Is it worth being alive, yet not knowing anything but your name and a couple faces? Faces I don't recognize..

"_Stop making those faces Bella. It isn't the end of the world. You'll see me again."_

"_It's not the same Jake. I miss you every time I go. The time seems longer and longer each visit." The boy throws an arm around the girl, it's a comforting  
gesture, but the girl's frown stays in place. The boy just pulls her closer and she lays her head on his shoulder._

"_It won't be long this time Bells. I promise."_

Promise.. Promise.. I wonder if he ever kept that promise? I wonder If I ever made any promises. Did I promise someone the world? Did someone promise me the world?

I don't know. More questions. How long have I been here? In this place with a monster. With footsteps and a voice. Why am I here? Did I do something wrong?

Is that why no one will come? Is that why no one will save me? Is that why all those promises I must have made are now broken?

Maybe I'm the one who's broken. Opening door after door, to find nothing but another hallway. Another door. Is this place even real? Or am I just lost inside  
my head. Lost in a place I can't get out.

A place no one can get in.

All these voices and footsteps and faces. What do they mean?

What do they mean?

"_What do you mean you want to move back with your father?"_

"_It's just that this is my last year of high school and I haven't seen Charli-I mean dad in a while."_

"_You sure you want this? You know me and Phil will miss you so much."_

"_I know mom, but I want this. I really do."_

"_Alright. I'll call your father in the morning."_

"_Thanks mom."_

Mom. Mom. Mom. Will I ever see you again? Will I ever recognize your face? Remember your voice? Will I ever hug you again? Do you still miss me?

Does anyone miss me?

Do I have anyone to miss?

"_Don't forget to call and email everyday."_

"_I know mom, I know. Don't worry. I'll miss you too."_

I do mom. I miss you. Please come save me. Will no one save me? Soon I'll be nothing. I'll be gone. But then what?

Will I go to heaven? Will I go to hell?

Some one save me soon, please. I don't think I can save myself. There's just so many doors. So many hallways. So many faces. So many footsteps.

Only one voice.

Is that why no matter how loud I scream no one can hear me? Because I'm the only one here?

Is the voice I hear my own? Are the footsteps I hear just an echo of my own?

No the voice is too soft, to sweet, to angel like to be mine. Maybe that's what it is, an angel, coming to save me. To set me free.

To let me be me once again.

I don't know! I don't know! I'm tired. Tired of running. Tired of everything. It's all just so.. new..

"_Your Isabella right? Chief swans daughter? The new girl."_

"_Uhh yea.. Actually it's Bella."_

"_Well Bella, I'm Mike. Nice to meet you."_

"_Yea you too. I better get to class now, bye Mike."_

"_Oh hey wait! You should hang out with me and my friend at lunch. Yea?"_

"_Uh sure. Bye."_

"_See you later Bella!"_

Will I ever seem him, Mike, later? Will I ever see anyone I used to know later?

Will I even have a later?

_A group of kids were sitting at a table, laughing and messing around. There were 6 of them. Three girls and three guys. One girl had glasses and a book,  
seeming lost in her own world. Another had brown blonde hair, talking so fast and staring at one of the boys. He had blonde hair and blue eyes. While the  
others had black hair and brown eyes. The last girl looked out of place. With her brown hair flowing around her shoulders, her pale skin and deep brown eyes.  
She looked lost and new. _

_Just then a door opened and in came the five most beautiful people anyone has ever seen. Two girls and three guys. One guy had short brown hair and a body  
that most men dreamed of having. Another one looked as if he was in pain, shaggy hair fell in front of his eyes, shielding him from people. The last guy looked  
bored, but wore an amused smile, as if he could read the thoughts of everyone in the room. One girl had blonde hair and a glare that could send the toughest  
guy running to mommy. The other girl, however, was the definition of goddess. With black spikey hair that shouted I know I'm hot and a smile that would turn anyone to jello._

"_Who are they?" The out of place girl asked._

"_Them? Oh they're the Cullen's." The book worm said._

"_Yea they are like all adopted and like all together, together." The blond brown headed girl said with a look of disgust on her face._

"_Don't listen to Jess, she's just mad that Edward," The bored looking one, "Turned her down."_

_The girl huffed and when back at staring at the blonde blue eye girl. While the bookworm rolled her eyes._

" _The guys are Emmet the big guy, Jasper the one who looks like he's in pain, and Edward. The blonde girl is Rosalie and the spikey pixie one is Alice."_

"_Alice…."_

Alice. Alice. I know that name! I do I swear. It sounded so familiar. So real. Like I've said it a thousand times.

I know that name. I know Alice….

" _So tell me, how does one become a vampire exactly?"_

"_It's a painful process love, one that I wouldn't wish on anyone. You see being a vampire is like having a disease running through your body. Instead of blood,  
we have venom running in our veins. That venom gives us life, but is also the cause for our thirst. To turn someone into a vampire, you would bite them and  
release the venom into their bloodstream. Then wait."_

"_That's it?"_

"_It's not as simple as it sounds Bell, it's very painful. The transformation of replacing the blood with the venom can be long or short. It all depends on if your  
body fights it or not. Some may take hours, some days, it all depends."_

"_So your saying it all depends on whether the person receiving the venom wants it or not?"_

"_Well when you put it that way, yes."_

"_I see.."_

"_The answer is no Bella."_

"_I don't know what your talking about."_

"_I can see your brain working, I'm not changing you into a vampire."_

"_I never said you had to Alice."_

Alice, who are you to me? Are you a lover? Or something else entirely? Will you save me from this place? I don't care if you're a vampire, or a zombie, or whatever.  
Just save me, please. You called me love, so does this mean that you love me? If you do then where are you?

Why are you not here with me?

Whatever the reason, I will find you. I will find Charlie. I will find Jake. My mother, Mike, Jess, and all the others. I will find you.

Before I lose myself.

_Tick tock  
__The clock rings  
__I don't have the answers  
__To the questions I seek_

_These voices  
__Inside my head  
__They invade my thoughts  
__I'm filled with dread_

_Will I get out of this place?  
__Will I remember her face?  
__This person who loves me  
__A vampire, where is my reality?_

_My time runs thin  
__I feel my throat closing in  
__I can't breath  
__The air is thick_

_Why does the clock  
__Always seem to tick?_

I can't do this, I've ran out of time. So many memories filled my mind. My name is Bella. That's the least I know. I have a lover, who I might never see again.  
I'm tired of opening so many doors. Tired of not finding a way out.

Tears run down my face, but I do not cry. If I am meant to die here in this place I will die with my head held high. I shall show this monster, that I won't give him  
what he wants. I shall not scream. No matter the cost.

Some might say I am a fool, for giving up so easily. But they don't know how it feels to be trapped inside your head. The place you think your safe.  
The place no one can come in. I might die a fool, but at least I'm not living one.

I feel tired now. So very tired. I will just lay down now. It's time to rest my head. To think back and remember all the blood I have shed. To the people  
I have forgotten and the lover I know I've left behind do not cry for me. Do not give in to the monsters wishes. Show him he's not that strong. Show him  
he will never win again. Show him love beats all. And that he is just a sin.

Can you see it? I can, the light up ahead. It's warm on my skin. It's so bright, it burns my eyes.

Charlie, my father don't look so beat up.

Mother, don't miss me anymore.

Jake, don't make promises you can't keep.

Alice, my angel do not weep.

The light, it's calling me in. You all should know that I do not wish to die, but sometimes, the monster wins.

Love

The word everyone wishes to  
hear. Everyone wishes to speak. **There**

Is no better feeling, than that of  
love. To be one with another. **Is**

Love worth the pain? Worth  
the blood that's shed. **No**

Love is worth far more than blood  
love is worth life. It's worth death. **Love**

Don't you see? I will never blame you.  
I only blame me. Love tell me **Where**

Did you go? When the monster came  
out to play. When he came out to feast. **The**

Monster does not love. It does not feel.  
The monster is the devils voice. A voice of **Darkness**

That stays in your head. Don't cry for me  
Love. I understand now. I should have  
Seen the mask. I should have seen the signs.  
It's my own fault I was caught in a love of **Lies.**

_So remember  
__As the light starts to fade  
__I'm the one who took the road  
__That followed the butterfly._

* * *

Please Review :]


	15. Two Hearts

A.N. Well guys it's been an amazing ride. I thank everyone who has read this story. I especially thank my reviewers. You guys made this story my  
finest pieces of work. I hope you all enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Until we meet again, fellow readers.

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or the song Six Months by Hey Monday.

I like thank all my reviewers and I will by posting a long thank you with everyone's names. But I'd like to give all my thanks in the world to Eden Storm.  
Without her I would have never even finished this story.

Without Further adu, please Enjoy the last chapter of A road, A butterfly, and Two hearts.

* * *

Two Hearts

_Time is nothing  
__But a word to regret  
__Love is nothing  
__But a feeling  
__Inside my head  
_

_Can I regret  
__The words I whispered in your ear?  
__Can I take back  
__The pain I caused you dear?_

_You gave me your heart  
__And I made it bleed  
__What kind of monster  
__Does that make me?_

_Happiness used to be  
__Just a trigger away  
__Now my happiness  
__Is just a faded memory_

_I hate this monster  
__That I've set free  
__I hate the voice  
__That invades my head_

_I see you now  
__I'm watching you bleed  
__In a world full of love  
__Two hearts is more than enough_

_Two hearts  
__(Yours and mine)  
__Two hearts  
__(Mine and yours)_

_In a world full of love  
__Two hearts  
__Is always better  
__Than one._

I've spent so much time, watching the rain. Watching it pound against the window in it's own melody. It's embracing the window. Cooling it with  
it's tiny drops filled with water. I used to love the rain. I used to watch it embrace me

_Rain rain go away  
__Come back another day._

I've spent so much time, staring at these walls. The white fading into gray, the gray fading into black. The moss in the corner. The crack by the window.

The window with the rain.

_Rain rain go away  
__How could you wash away  
__My love today?_

I've spent so much time, hating myself. So much time, wishing for death. Wishing I could just walk into a tornado of fire and feel it melt my skin.  
But it wouldn't work. The rain would just wash it away.

_Rain rain go away  
__Why did you  
__Let me live?_

I've spent so much time, sitting here remembering the better times. The times when I had my monster under control. The times where I didn't know  
my monster was _real. _

It's as real as the window being embraced by the rain.

_Rain rain just go away  
__You've destroyed my love  
__She's lost at sea  
_

_You've ripped my undead heart  
__From my chest  
__And watched it  
__Bleed._

Time, for a vampire, goes by so fast. A second is a minute. A minute is an hour. So on and so forth.

But now? Time has seized to exist. The never ending ticking of the clock is silent.

Silence is all I hear.

All I can do is listen to my memories. To the first time I met…. her. That day my monster was born. That day I received a devils voice.

She was the most beautiful human I had ever seen. So real and alive. It was love at first sight.

But it was thirst for my monster.

The creature that pumps through my veins. That gives me life. That ended my love.

I didn't know it then, as I do now, but she was my monster's prey. I thought I could control him, this devil inside me. I couldn't and now she must  
pay the price.

The price she doesn't deserve.

I remember our first kiss, how I will _never _forget that day. How her lips fit perfectly against mine. How I wanted to do it again and again.

_**Forever.**_

Then my monster had to ruin it. I knew that she was mine and only mine, but my monster likes to claim what's his. And Rosalie pressed the right buttons.

I remember how scared I felt, watching b- her leave. The terrified look in her eyes. The confusion. All the emotions swirling in the air, Jasper must  
have had a rough time that day.

That was the day it all started. How I needed to drink more frequently. How my control was slipping. But I didn't see it.

I too, was blinded by the monster.

_Blinded by the voice inside my head.  
__The pounding it did when I was hungry.  
__The silence when I was alone._

I remember how quite it was, when Edward told me that be…..that she would know soon enough what we were.

What we hide everyday.

I didn't realize, that the silence was part of the monsters plan. To derail me from controlling him. To keep him ahead of the game.

A game I didn't know I was playing.

I remember the overwhelming joy I felt, when bel…. when she came to see me. To tell me she knew and that she was okay with what I was.

With who I am.

If only I knew, that the monster wanted this too. If only I knew….

_If only I saw  
__The face in the mirror  
_

_If only I could stop  
__The glass from breaking_

I was so elated, she was mine! Only mine. Always mine.

We were mates, for life.

Now, where has her life gone? It's disappeared, along with my monster.

The monster that put her in this place. This place that reeks of death and loss. The monster that put her there in that bed, with tubes and machines keeping her alive.

The same monster that almost killed my love, my Bella.

I could see the future, God Dammit! Why didn't I see this coming? Why did I let her down.

She gave me her heart and I spat on it. I kicked it and smashed it. I should have known I couldn't protect it.

And I couldn't give her mine in return.

For my heart is dead, as cold as my skin. It doesn't beat or pump blood. It just stays there, in my chest. Bleeding for love.

I was the one who did this. I was the one who put her here. Who made her unable to speak. Not able to open her eyes and smile.

Not able to love me. She's lost, the doctors say, lost inside her head. A place that's so hard to leave.

And impossible to enter.

It's been so long, so much time holding her hand and whispering sorry in her ear.

It's been six months, since I've seen her smile. Seen her laugh. Seen her cry. So much time, watching the rain. Staring at the wall. Alone.

All alone.

Edward and Jasper have come to visit, to watch her when I eat. But what's there to watch? She's just a body, a memory of her former self.  
I can see it, in their eyes. They don't believe she will ever wake up. They don't believe she can find her way out.

_But I do._

I won't let her.. Die. I won't, because if she dies, I die too.

They know this. They all do. Even Rosalie. Heartless Rose, comes to see me every now and then. I can see it in her eyes too, the regret. The pain we all share.

Together, as a family.

I sit here, everyday. Watching her, waiting for her to open her eyes.

I just want to see her smile. That smile I've come to love. I want to tell her how sorry I am. How I never wanted this to happen.

How I should have had more control.

No one blames me though. They all know the monster that pumps through our veins is strong. They all know, except Charlie.

Oh Charlie, I'm so sorry. I'm so very sorry..

He comes in everyday and the air in the room just screams pain. It screams sadness and loss. But the loudest scream, the loudest one of all….

_Is the scream of love. _

It pounds against your ears and mixes in with the tears that roll down your cheeks. It's a suffocating scream. For once, I wished I could breath.  
So I could drown in it. So I could swallow it and feel it burn my throat.

It's an agonizing scream. One that everyone feels, the doctors, nurses. Everyone. It seeps into your skin, coating your body in it. You can't escape it.

You will never escape it.

_Love, my sweet love  
__Won't you open your eyes  
__For me tonight?_

_Love, my dear love  
__Won't you smile  
__And make my dreams come true?_

I never thought vampires could cry. I never thought vampires could feel intense pain.

_But we can._

_**I do.**_

I keep wondering, if I got the chance to turn back the clock would I? If I had the chance to never have met Bella and save her from myself would I?

The saddest thing is, I can't find it in myself to say yes. I've spent so many years, so many decades alone. Without love.

Whoever said it was better to love and lost then to never have loved at all is wrong.

They are _**so **_wrong.

It hurts to not have love at all, but it _kills _to lose love.

It's a feeling one can comprehend. It rips at your soul and destroys your mind. It stabs you in the heart. In the lungs. In the stomach. It beats your  
body, mind and soul till your nothing. You're not even a ghost.

You're not even dead.

I know I'm a selfish person. I don't deserve love. I don't deserve Bella.

But I want her anyway. She's my life. My soul. My reason for existing.

My reason for the pain I went through to tame my monster.

My monster and me are now at one. I am in control. Bella is not _**his**_ prey, Bella is _**our **_mate.

I protect my mate, even if that's from myself.

_The monster in me  
__How I hate thee  
__The monster in me  
_

_How I've freed you  
__I've dropped the shackles  
__I've cut the chains  
__Your cage is open  
_

_Please pay your token  
__For the life you almost destroyed  
__You will pay the price  
_

_Step up now boy  
__Place your head on the guillotine  
__Close your eyes now  
__Your nothing  
__But a memory _

_I control you  
__Monster inside me  
__Now it's time  
__You play the fool_

I will never let my monster free again. I will never let it destroy another life. I will control my monster, for Charlie, for myself, for Bella.

My sweet Bella. What have I done? Was I so out of control to attack Edward while you were in his arms? Was I so stupid to think he would steal you?  
I hate the monster that pumps in my veins. I hate how I can never change what happened. How I can never rewind the clock back.

How I can _never _make it not tick.

_Tick tock  
__The clock screams  
__Tick tock  
__It tells me_

Beep beep is all I hear, besides the rain embracing the window. The beeping of a machine that keeps you alive.

That keeps you _real._

_Tick tock  
__The clock speak  
__Tick tock  
__My reality has become bleak_

_Where have you gone  
__Love that keeps me strong  
__Will we ever be  
__Two whole hearts again?_

It's been six months, I've heard that beeping. Six long painful months.

Even Charlie is losing hope. Hope that she will wake up, is fading. It's vanishing, along with the visits and comforting words. Even Jacob has stopped hoping.

Yes, Jacob Black the werewolf, my mortal enemy has come by. I know he did it to see Bella, but it was comforting. I know he blames me. At least some  
one does. I can see it though, in his eyes, the longing and pain.

The emptiness.

It's all I can do now is watch the world fade by me. Watching all the humans fight to live.

Live to fight.

In a world full of fighting, hope is the one thing everyone relies on. Through all the blood shed, it's the only thing that makes sense. The only thing that's real.

_We can win each battle  
__And still lose the war  
__So is the blood shed  
__Really worth it at all?_

_In a world full of war  
__Peace does not exist  
__In a world full of death  
__Love can not win._

I've spent so long, replaying that day over and over in my head. Only Bella can twist her ankle by tripping over a lady bug. Only my clumsy little human.  
I saw it, the day before it happened. We would go to school, like always. I'd have to carry Bella until she finally agreed to use the crutches. We would go  
all our classes without any problems. Then I'd take her on our first official date. There would be dancing, candle light, soft music..

Except I didn't see the monster. I didn't see him ruin everything. I was in a blind rage. Fighting Rose then chasing after Edward, thinking he was hurting Bella.  
No, he was protecting her.

From _me. _

I was so blinded by the monster, that I didn't see Bella in Edward's arms when I crashed into him. I didn't see her fly and hit the ground. I didn't _see. _

It took me ten seconds to calm down. Ten seconds to pull back the monster. Ten seconds to destroy everything I fought for.

Everything I loved.

I sat there holding Bella's limp body in my arms, sobbing as much as a vampire could sob. With the pained faces of my family around me.

I destroyed a whole forest after we took Bella to the hospital. I broke every tree I could find, so they would all match my heart. Carlisle said she didn't have  
any broken bones or eternal bleeding. She just hit her head.

She hit it _hard._

At first I couldn't stand the sight of Bella, of what I had done. I left for a month. Left my family and Forks behind. I was in search of a way to end my monster.  
To end it once and for all.

It took me a month to realize that Bella was the only one who could do that. She was the only one who could tame my monster. So I went back to Forks, back  
to Bella, and I haven't left since.

I tamed my monster by not drinking like I used to. Instead of days in between 'meals' I waited weeks. It showed my monster who was boss. Who was in control.

I would never hurt Bella again. I am in control.

_To the monster I once called my friend  
__You will never be in control again  
__I will place you in your cage  
__I will rap you with chains  
__I will bound your soul together  
__I will throw you in flames_

_This is a game  
__I will not lose  
__You are nothing  
__But gum on my shoe_

_To the monster that hurt my love  
__You shall be no more  
__Forever undone._

I've spent so much time, watching the rain against the window. Watching it bring life to the world outside this room. The world outside this hospital.

I've sat here, for so long, waiting for my love to wake. To open her eyes and tell me it will all be okay. So I can tell her I'm sorry, for the pain I've caused.  
Sorry for everything.

Just wake up Bella. Please.

"Alice," Edward whispered from the door, " It's been six months. Don't you think it's tim-"

"No." I answered, firmly.

He sighed, " Ali, even Charlie has stopped coming."

"I don't care. I'm not letting her go. Ever. This is my fault and I'll be damned if I leave her now." I choke back a sob, resting my head on Bella's pillow.  
Edward leaves quietly, closing the door behind him. They just don't understand. I won't give up. I'll never give up, until Bella wakes up. It's my fault she's  
here, lying in this bed like sleeping beauty.

Only a kiss won't wake her up.

_Oh Juliet, my Juliet  
__Will you wake  
__If I place a kiss  
__On your lips_

_Oh Juliet  
__I'm sorry  
__For the pain you feel_

_I wish I could  
__Take it all away  
__I wish I could  
__Wake you from this grave_

_Oh Juliet my love  
__Won't you come back to me  
__Won't you come on home._

_As I sit here  
__Watching you fade  
__My undead heart clenches  
__With un relenting pain_

Bella, my sweet Bella. How I never got to tell you how much you mean to me. How I can't live without you. How much _I love you. _

_Roses are red  
__Violets are blue  
__I never got the chance  
__To say I love you_

_So I'll pick up the pieces  
__Of my shattered heart  
__And glue them together  
__Hoping it will start_

_Roses are red  
__Violets are blue  
__I can only hope  
__You love me too_

_**Beep Beep Beep**_

It's been six months I've listened to that beating machine. A machine that's given you life.

_Six months._

_**You're the direction I follow  
**__**To get home  
**__**When I feel like I can't go on  
**__**You tell me to go  
**__**And it's like I can't feel a thing  
**__**Without you around  
**__**And don't mind me  
**__**If I get weak in the knees  
**_'_**Cause you have that effect on me, you do**_

_**Everything you say  
**__**Every time we kiss, I can't think straight  
**__**But I'm okay**_

_**And I can't think of anybody else  
**__**Who I hate to miss as much as I hate missing you**_

_**Months going strong now, and no goodbye  
**__**Unconditional, unoriginal  
**__**Always by my side  
**__**Meant to be together  
**__**Meant for no one but each other  
**__**You love me, I love you harder so**_

_**Everything you say  
**__**Every time we kiss, I can't think straight  
**__**But I'm okay**_

_**And I can't think of anybody else  
**__**Who I hate to miss as much as I hate missing you**_

_**So please, give me a hint  
**__**So please, give me a lesson on how to steal, steal a heart  
**__**As fast as you stole mine, as you stole mine**_

_**Oh and everything you say  
**__**Every time we kiss, I can't think straight  
**__**But I'm okay**_

_**And I can't think of anybody else  
**__**Who I hate to miss as much as I hate missing you**_

_**So pleas, give me a hint  
**__**So please, just take my hand.**_

It's been six months I've watched the rain.

Six months I've stared at these walls.

Six months of wishing.

Six months of hoping.

Six months, that could never prepare me for this.

_**Beep beep beep beep.**_

I felt the pillow shift from under my head. The pillow was moving. No. No

_Bella _was moving. But how can she move when she's asleep….

Oh

My

God.

"Bella?" I asked, with a tremor in my voice.

I heard a groan and more shifting. Instantly I shot up and was met with her eyes.

Her _opened _eyes.

"Bella! Oh Bella!" I exclaimed so loud, I heard the thundering footsteps of my family and the smashing of the door against the wall. But that didn't matter,  
for I was too busy cradling her face in my hands and shaking the tears from my eyes. She was were awake! Instantly the tension in the room disappeared,  
along with the sadness and the rain.

"Oh Bella I'm so sorry! I love you so much please forgive me! Please!" I pleaded, staring into her eyes, hope gnawing at my chest.

_You stared at me for a couple of seconds, before briefly glancing at the smiling faces of my family, then back at me. You opened your mouth, but nothing  
came out. You tried again and again, but you just couldn't form words. _

Worried, I placed my hands on your waist and helped you sit up, against the wall.

"Bella? Honey?" I whispered.

_You looked at me again, and this time I could see it. The pain in your eyes. The pain and confusion. And then you opened your mouth and spoke for the  
first time in six months. You spoke words I will never forget._

And never wish to remember.

"Who are you?"

_In this world, full of pain  
__Love is a gift, love is a gain  
_

_In this world, full of war  
__Love is a battle, love is a scar_

_Love is many things  
__It's a flower that blooms  
__It's a tree that grows  
__It's a life, that brings hope_

_In this world there are choices we make  
__Roads we must follow  
__Paths we must take_

_A path full of Love  
__Is a path worth the journey  
__So remember as the pain takes hold  
__When you take a road  
__Just follow the butterfly  
__It will lead you home._

_Home is where the heart is  
__The heart that holds love  
__And with love  
__Two hearts  
__Is always better than one_

_So remember as the light go dim  
__Don't let your monsters win_

_Look to the sky, when the rain pours  
__Keep your head held high  
__When the storm comes_

_If you follow the road  
__That has the butterfly  
__Then you know  
__Two hearts  
__Is better than one_

_**Two Hearts  
**__Is better than one._

**To be continued…**


	16. New AN

This is not a chapter, but I promise I will get working on the sequel soon.

Now the reason for this is to thank all my reviewers. I seriously thank you all and there's no amount of thanks I could give out to all of you who reviewed. This is my first story that got over 100 reviews, so that's why I'm doing this. I hope to see you all review when the sequel comes out. Which will be pretty soon. I'm terribly sorry to those of you who didn't want it to end that way. But I believe it's safe to say no one guess that right?

Well I thank you all once again. Until next time!

**New note: This is for lynettecullen and everyone else who didn't know. The first chapter of the sequel is up. Check out my story A trip down Memory Lane. Hope you like!**

Static

Lexus

Phoenix99

Stand Through The Pain

Fan1

MOOca

DarkBella

A Little Bit Clumsy Bella

Nandinhama

Roselie's Muse

Jezikial

Ethans mom

Blue1991

Luz

Lexy lujan

Eden

Eden fan

Dexterous

Nessiteras Rhombopteryx

Ash

Darkwithinlight

Pacman

Enigma 101

WhoMe

Kyraaah1992

MiNicole

MirandaPasz

Time4Change

Shaz89

Room 1 oh 1

TimeOut

Squib

StormChaser

Swwblackhawk

Anon

Fan5

DARKnessWithin

Miranda575

Tiz

Muse

EmoPandaRocks

Tifftails88

If I forgot anyone or if I spelled any names wrong I'm sorry. I really hope I didn't forget anyone…

-Brokenvoice


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